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NeatNit

Offline (the 07/19/2014 at 11:59am) | Search for a member

NeatNit

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10865
  • Number of comments : 777
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>nineteen99</b> - 22 hours ago<b>anormalperson</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 4:11pm<b>Thedudebroman</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:50pm<b>boxofries</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:18pm<b>savery</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 5:35pm<b>avatarwill5</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:38am<b>Hashk</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:26am<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 10:20pm<b>coolifly</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:24pm<b>Firewar</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:32pm<b>shine999</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 5:16pm<b>MrsDavehn</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:54pm<b>jaquie0812</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 11:55am<b>Brittany_Leann</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 10:25am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 7:22am<b>TeamTurnUp</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:15am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:58am<b>CyborgBanana</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 8:32pm

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77885) - you deserved it (7074)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

#20742609
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58496) - you deserved it (3809)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

#20738804
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48087) - you deserved it (10123)

On 06/21/2013 at 10:28am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

#20732995
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53511) - you deserved it (5143)

On 06/18/2013 at 9:06am - work - by Not a day over 35 (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

#20731669
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49126) - you deserved it (6447)

On 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I attended my mother's funeral. My husband came too, and during the service, I kept hearing him giggling. I wrote it off as the usual awkward nerves, until he started snorting too, and I caught sight of the iPhone under his jacket. He was reading this very site. FML

#20725457
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57890) - you deserved it (3961)

On 06/14/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, I started playing softball again in a league after not playing for about 5 years. My very first time at the bat I whacked a foul ball into the parking lot and hit my own car. FML

#20724193
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43145) - you deserved it (6126)

On 06/13/2013 at 7:59pm - misc - by Dingbat - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my estranged father, who is a cop, decided to show up to my 17th birthday party. He immediately began arresting people for underage drinking. Way to mend fences, dad. FML

#20723133
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46716) - you deserved it (23886)

On 06/13/2013 at 6:16am - misc - by fuckyouverymuch (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37240) - you deserved it (67699)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML

#20721430
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63894) - you deserved it (3434)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, in class, we were discussing stereotypes. We were asked about common ones about nearby cities. A guy said, "Well, they say Lumberton has the prettiest girls." My teacher asked if any of us were from Lumberton, so I raised my hand. The guy quickly said, "Nevermind." FML

#20717445
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54764) - you deserved it (5344)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:04pm - misc - by wellthanks (woman) - United States

Today, I was at work talking to an older man. As our conversation ended, he said, "Thank you, ma'am." Then, he quickly stumbled over his words as he said, "I mean, thank you, sir. I meant sir. I think." He gazed at me for a moment in confusion, then darted away. FML

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

#20673456
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45756) - you deserved it (3495)

On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45316) - you deserved it (4815)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bed, I dreamed that she broke up with me, again. FML

#20670246
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43397) - you deserved it (5674)

On 05/18/2013 at 1:22am - love - by Sarsippius -



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