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NeatNit

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NeatNit

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13062
  • Number of comments : 817
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>BigMeepers</b> - 3 hours ago<b>random_cashmere</b> - 15 hours ago<b>123ika</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Jreslier</b> - 22 hours ago<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - 22 hours ago<b>Zoey_M</b> - yesterday at 9:11am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 1:00am<b>BreadstickFTW</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:51pm<b>nataliewby</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 2:26pm<b>chandlerjohnvy</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 7:34am<b>drugsRfun</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 1:19am<b>polarbearpiss</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:43am<b>Crofty92</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:30am<b>Bloink</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:58am<b>Rozza17</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 5:04am<b>redneck_wolf</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:30am<b>bitemeimirish</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:33pm<b>stoylie97</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 2:39pm

NeatNit's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of NeatNit's badges

NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, I explained to my roommate that if she kept using all of our kitchen utensils as sex toys and hoarding them because of the varying degrees of orgasms she could achieve, we wouldn't be able to cook or eat in our own house. FML

Today, I was at the doctor's getting a check up. He asked me if I was allergic to anything, to which I blurted out, "Cats." He gave me a weird look and said, "Don't worry, I won't give you cats." FML

#20865755
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39504) - you deserved it (6539)

On 09/03/2013 at 4:17am - health - by NoNotCats =^._.^= (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad told me I was folding my laundry all wrong. I said with a smirk, "A little clothes-minded, are we?" He slapped me. Hard. FML

#20865687
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49516) - you deserved it (10678)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by fml (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43039) - you deserved it (7340)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, I received a text saying, "I don't think we should be friends anymore. You're terribly depressing and you make everyone unhappy" followed by, "Oops, wrong person!" and then by, "Sorry, it really is for you". FML

#20839682
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42744) - you deserved it (4334)

On 08/16/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54225) - you deserved it (6162)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend texted me "I think we should move in". Then, ten seconds later she sent another text that said, "Sorry, typo. Move on". FML

Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend and his friends. When I stood up, he told his friend "See, she's not a twig!" I jokingly replied with, "So I'm fat?" After a few seconds of silence, his friend yelled, "It's a trap!" and left the chat. FML

#20825004
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43913) - you deserved it (13897)

On 08/07/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by ImNotFat - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

#20820272
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43984) - you deserved it (10105)

On 08/04/2013 at 12:45pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48620) - you deserved it (4860)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I got the sex talk from my dad. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't said "It's not the size of the stick, it's how you use it." I'm a girl. FML

#20814602
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54795) - you deserved it (4529)

On 08/01/2013 at 1:10am - intimacy - by confused_girl (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

#20813979
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54529) - you deserved it (5244)

On 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, I was in a training about the newest changes in CPR. The trainer was discussing chest compression techniques and said she prefers "good, fast, hard pumping." I was the only one who snickered out loud, drawing several annoyed looks from the other trainees. I'm a 45-year-old doctor. FML

#20803758
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38199) - you deserved it (18235)

On 07/25/2013 at 11:15pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband was chased out of a bar after he was seen slipping something into a woman's drink. I was the woman, the 'something' was aspirin, and that's the last time we ever try to role-play. FML

#20798724
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47924) - you deserved it (26845)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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