About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.
NeatNit's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
NeatNit's favorite FMLs
Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML
by Anonymous / 02/17/2013 at 12:56am / United States / Miscellaneous
by MsCobb / 02/16/2013 at 10:27am / United States (Ohio) / Love
by PokeWife / 02/06/2013 at 8:38am / United States (Nebraska) / Love
Today, I called security at my school because I left my mittens in a classroom and it was locked. When the security officer showed up, he asked if the mittens I was looking for were the ones on my hands. I even had to take one of them off to call them. FML
by swarm20 / 02/05/2013 at 12:24am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, working as a nurse, I saw a patient in for follow-up after a partial leg amputation. I checked her blood pressure and gave her the reading, which prompted her husband to ask what it meant. She replied, "I'm alive." Before I could stop myself, "And kicking" spilled out of my mouth. FML
by facepalm / 02/04/2013 at 10:30pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health
Today, I was moving into my new apartment. The previous owner had refused to move out until today, and when I got there, I realized I didn't have a key. I was about to call him when I found out I didn't need to; he took the door. FML
by jeoak / 01/30/2013 at 12:25pm / India / Miscellaneous
by Miss Blairgowrie / 01/30/2013 at 2:52am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML
by dynah114 / 01/27/2013 at 2:08pm / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Miscellaneous
by pdub523 / 01/27/2013 at 12:57am / United States (Texas) / Love
by LucidNightmare / 01/27/2013 at 12:38am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to buy a birthday present for my boyfriend. While buying him a sweater, the cashier tried to up-sale me by asking if my boyfriend wore briefs or boxers, because both were on sale. Not thinking, I blurted out, "I don't know, they just come off." FML
by awkwardturtle / 01/25/2013 at 12:31am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by sarah6786 / 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by AnonCat / 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
by Claire / 01/19/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Maryland) / Love