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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 30398
  • Number of comments : 1103
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>ktrashy</b> - yesterday at 4:02am<b>smeegle</b> - the 10/23/2016 at 7:26pm<b>buttcrackles</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 10:12pm<b>Smirez</b> - the 10/13/2016 at 12:19am<b>The_Sexomancer</b> - the 10/02/2016 at 2:35am<b>potatocouch</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 6:59pm<b>optimusic</b> - the 09/22/2016 at 8:28am<b>atradr</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 10:08pm<b>VHNox</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 4:52pm<b>heirofhope</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 2:14pm<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 12:01pm<b>ThePerry</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 3:06am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 5:05pm<b>mas12806</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 12:56pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 5:51pm<b>Fennex3</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 6:16pm<b>TheBestAround23</b> - the 09/05/2016 at 11:16am<b>Undecidednumber</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 1:05pm

Fucked!<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 6:01pm<b>Undecidednumber</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 7:05pm<b>classicate</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 10:10am<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:10am<b>jackthekeeper</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 8:21am<b>billcosby31</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 3:29am<b>psychoIogical</b> - the 06/01/2016 at 3:41am<b>bruhwhy</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 5:14pm<b>thatguy206</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 8:01pm<b>Skydiver2001</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 10:13pm<b>samiam_123</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 12:38pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 5:32pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 2:17pm<b>hfudge</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 11:56pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 6:03pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 5:11am<b>zach205</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 8:40pm<b>zevida</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 6:26am

NeatNit's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of NeatNit's badges

NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, my estranged father, who is a cop, decided to show up to my 17th birthday party. He immediately began arresting people for underage drinking. Way to mend fences, dad. FML

by fuckyouverymuch / 06/13/2013 at 6:16am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, in class, we were discussing stereotypes. We were asked about common ones about nearby cities. A guy said, "Well, they say Lumberton has the prettiest girls." My teacher asked if any of us were from Lumberton, so I raised my hand. The guy quickly said, "Nevermind." FML

by wellthanks / 06/10/2013 at 1:04pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at work talking to an older man. As our conversation ended, he said, "Thank you, ma'am." Then, he quickly stumbled over his words as he said, "I mean, thank you, sir. I meant sir. I think." He gazed at me for a moment in confusion, then darted away. FML

by SApprentice / 06/05/2013 at 12:25am / United States (Virginia) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

by harrington61 / 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

by Mr_poole / 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bed, I dreamed that she broke up with me, again. FML

by Sarsippius / 05/18/2013 at 1:22am / Love

Today, I was eating a mystery flavored candy and I had an allergic reaction. Not only did I have to go to the hospital because my throat swelled up, but I still don't know what I'm allergic to. FML

by those_allergies / 05/12/2013 at 1:20am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

by ADickySituation / 05/05/2013 at 12:14am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm / Netherlands / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for cheating on her. Her "proof" was an image of me making out with a girl. Pretty damning, except she loaded it up in Photoshop, where I saw the image layers she'd used to fake the whole thing. I'm not sure what the hell she was thinking either. FML

by psycho ex / 05/02/2013 at 8:16pm / Brazil / Love

Today, my future father-in-law showed everyone a picture of his poop because it was "shaped like a banana." My fiancé's whole family thought it was funny and "looked more like a banana than last time." FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 11:04am / United States (Texas) / Health