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NeatNit

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NeatNit

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12433
  • Number of comments : 806
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>Rozza17</b> - 14 hours ago<b>redneck_wolf</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:30am<b>bitemeimirish</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:33pm<b>stoylie97</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 2:39pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 12:30pm<b>Jreslier</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 11:19am<b>sadbubbles</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 10:54am<b>orenjeo</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 2:52am<b>iunpossible</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 8:35pm<b>japodoz</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 1:55pm<b>thebigtwinkie</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 4:07am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 7:39pm<b>chloewj</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 4:44am<b>Brainnnnz</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:27am<b>Moonditch</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 4:17pm<b>BaconForAll</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 12:30am<b>itsalise</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 3:13pm<b>abdullahcakeman</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 3:01pm

NeatNit's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of NeatNit's badges

NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44284) - you deserved it (2608)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44984) - you deserved it (7572)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

#21238336
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17780) - you deserved it (34356)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm - money - by thoughthewasjoking (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML

#21230823
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39699) - you deserved it (3239)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:21am - kids - by We raised that fool (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49094) - you deserved it (21223)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

#21207892
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41522) - you deserved it (6137)

On 07/13/2014 at 12:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML

#21205080
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49095) - you deserved it (4737)

On 07/10/2014 at 1:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

#21187679
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52057) - you deserved it (16838)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:30am - kids - by failed dad (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, my daughter admitted why her grades, which are usually straight A's, have been slipping the past few weeks. Turns out she has been deliberately failing tests to avoid becoming valedictorian, so she won't have to deliver a speech at graduation. FML

#21148414
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49049) - you deserved it (6059)

On 05/22/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by stillaproudfather (man) - United States

Today, I was chewed out by a lady who claimed the laptop she bought wouldn't turn on, and that she wanted a refund. She yelled and shoved the laptop at me, not even listening when I told her I didn't even work at that store. FML

#21143801
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49679) - you deserved it (3885)

On 05/18/2014 at 10:14am - misc - by lemongrab (woman) - Canada

Today, my girlfriend decided that we won't be having any more sex until I beat her ridiculously high score on Flappy Bird. FML

#21141738
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52361) - you deserved it (7337)

On 05/16/2014 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by (not) fucked - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML

#21125215
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41821) - you deserved it (4811)

On 04/28/2014 at 11:38am - love - by salad - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25305) - you deserved it (55519)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)



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