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Mr_Plague

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Mr_Plague

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1603
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Mr_Plague's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:20pm

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Mr_Plague's favorite FMLs

Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML

#18728006
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31759) - you deserved it (4849)

On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my blanket got caught on my nose ring and it took my boyfriend over an hour to get it free. Afterwards, he admitted he was trying not to laugh because it reminded him of a bullfight. FML

#18726895
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11199) - you deserved it (27442)

On 01/06/2012 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - Mexico (Zacatecas)

Today, I told my parents that I wanted to donate blood. My dad helpfully interjected, "Sorry, they don't accept blood from gingers." FML

#18678605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29522) - you deserved it (7712)

On 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by GingerJ (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

#18671217
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46825) - you deserved it (3239)

On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

#18667019
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31410) - you deserved it (7626)

On 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by thathurt (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

#18661455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52388) - you deserved it (10714)

On 12/31/2011 at 4:21am - intimacy - by nickthetank (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I walked in on my daughter eating a handful of styrofoam packing pellets, because she thought they were Christmas candy. She's fourteen. What's next, eating rocks? FML

#18588984
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26041) - you deserved it (4320)

On 12/23/2011 at 1:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I ran full speed into a brick wall because I saw a tiger. On the other side of a zoo cage. FML

#18583606
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7668) - you deserved it (30879)

On 12/22/2011 at 10:02pm - animals - by steve - United States

Today, I was wanking and starting thinking about why the Simpsons are yellow, and how that came to be. I haven't been laid in 4 years and my ADD is so crippling that I can't jack off. FML

#18567252
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29624) - you deserved it (5604)

On 12/21/2011 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I woke up with Skittles super glued to my forehead. FML

#18561350
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27532) - you deserved it (5430)

On 12/20/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by awalc - United States

Today, I heard someone calling my name. It was my neighbor. Turns out they named their dogs after my mother, my sister and me. FML

#18560105
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28541) - you deserved it (3051)

On 12/20/2011 at 6:49am - misc - by IHopeYourDogsGetDiarrheaAndPoopOnYourBed (woman) - Mauritius

Today, I grabbed some lotion to have a good old wank. However, I'd got it a bit wrong in my rush to spurt my man-mush into an old gym sock, and had picked up some concentrated bronzer. I now have neon-orange hands and genitals. FML

#18556841
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8922) - you deserved it (44785)

On 12/19/2011 at 9:29pm - intimacy - by Colton (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

#18546937
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13759) - you deserved it (26502)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:36pm - misc - by Musicfreak (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31023) - you deserved it (2408)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML

#18533505
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29286) - you deserved it (8919)

On 12/17/2011 at 2:59am - misc - by MikeNick - United States



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