Mr_Plague

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Offline (the 03/02/2016 at 1:54am)

Mr_Plague

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3161
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Mr_Plague's page activity

Visits<b>scottishoatmeal</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 4:54am<b>JocelynKaulitz</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 5:48am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 11:20am<b>CliffyB03</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 3:54pm<b>ProximityToDeath</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 1:49am<b>chrisann1023</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 8:33am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 3:25am<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 3:19am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:20pm

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Mr_Plague's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

by Jesse / 05/10/2012 at 5:22pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm / United States / Money

Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML

by pathetic / 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm / Poland (Mazowieckie) / Geek

Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as "the bitch." FML

by stoggie96 / 04/22/2012 at 11:34am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

by Capteen / 04/22/2012 at 8:17am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

by mista_sandy / 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, it was the only time in my life that I have ever received an A+ for something. Thank you, eBay buyer. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2012 at 10:39am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Money

Today, my wife sent me to the store to pick stuff up so we could make BLTs. I got the bacon, but couldn't remember what else went into them, so I bought an avocado and napkins. When I got back home, my wife very slowly and sarcastically explained what BLT stands for. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2012 at 3:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML

by anonomous / 04/07/2012 at 11:27am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I caught myself staring at my grandmother's cleavage. FML

by bman / 04/07/2012 at 2:41am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

by Tanner / 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 27 year old boyfriend chose playing with Lego over making sweet love to me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 12:01pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I failed my driving test. I rammed into the parallel parking poles, ran a stop sign, and stopped at a cross intersection. My instructor called me an idiot. FML

by Brittany / 03/27/2012 at 10:38pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation