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Mr_Plague's favorite FMLs
by Jesse / 05/10/2012 at 5:22pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm / United States / Money
Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML
by pathetic / 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm / Poland (Mazowieckie) / Geek
by stoggie96 / 04/22/2012 at 11:34am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Capteen / 04/22/2012 at 8:17am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous
by mista_sandy / 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/10/2012 at 10:39am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/09/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Money
Today, my wife sent me to the store to pick stuff up so we could make BLTs. I got the bacon, but couldn't remember what else went into them, so I bought an avocado and napkins. When I got back home, my wife very slowly and sarcastically explained what BLT stands for. FML
by Anonymous / 04/07/2012 at 3:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML
by anonomous / 04/07/2012 at 11:27am / United States / Intimacy
by bman / 04/07/2012 at 2:41am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by Tanner / 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 12:01pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by Brittany / 03/27/2012 at 10:38pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation
- 1Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…