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Monkeyone

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Monkeyone

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 375
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Monkeyone's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:48am

Monkeyone's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Monkeyone's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML

#20016514
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19005) - you deserved it (1914)

On 08/12/2012 at 5:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had a nasty cough, but I went to college anyway. When I walked into class, I could practically smell menstrual blood in the air. After a few coughs, our instructor gave me an "Oh, shut up!" After half an hour, she kicked me out for not "taking the class seriously". FML

#19290632
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21671) - you deserved it (7354)

On 03/16/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by danny5191 (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I received numerous text messages from my parents asking where I was and how worried they are. I was in my room, they didn't even notice me walk in. FML

#18742871
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26632) - you deserved it (2659)

On 01/08/2012 at 2:24am - misc - by musicislife1337 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
443 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63172) - you deserved it (6598)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

#15702397
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22052) - you deserved it (11595)

On 04/09/2011 at 12:01am - health - by FistFighter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put a tampon in. The string broke. I had to go to the hospital to get it out. FML

#12894128
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39998) - you deserved it (6547)

On 09/03/2010 at 11:47pm - health - by lalalasmiles06 -

Today, I put a tampon in. The string broke. I had to go to the hospital to get it out. FML

#12894128
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39998) - you deserved it (6547)

On 09/03/2010 at 11:47pm - health - by lalalasmiles06 -

Today, I went to the doctor. For the past year, my stomach would get upset every time I ate. Attempting to ease the pain, I would always eat a piece of bread. My doctor told me I have Celiac disease, which means I'm allergic to gluten. I'm allergic to bread. FML

Today, my mother sent a letter to my best friend trying to comfort her over the death of her mother. She signed the letter "LOL, Jen" thinking LOL stood for "lots of love." FML

#1429978
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61108) - you deserved it (5132)

On 04/28/2009 at 5:51pm - misc - by unlolable4321 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a surgery to remove a cyst from my butt. Afterwards that doctor told me that the cyst was bigger than he initially thought, it would still secrete fluids for two weeks, and the best remedy for this was to wear a maxi-pad. I'm a guy, and am currently wearing a maxi-pad on my butt. FML

#1082247
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98128) - you deserved it (5602)

On 04/18/2009 at 10:24am - health - by Ian (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

#718937
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (128902) - you deserved it (14527)

On 03/31/2009 at 1:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

#718937
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (128902) - you deserved it (14527)

On 03/31/2009 at 1:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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