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About Miss_Michaela : All I can say is if you are able to fit your whole life in this box, you have had a boring one.
I do love England. LEFT HAND DRIVE FOR THE GODDAMN WIN!
I don't get people who don't know or don't care about the difference between their/there/they're, your/you're and were/where/we're. Here is a Full Stop: . Please use it.
My hates: Having 'xx and/or 'lol'' on the end of everything. People who aren't sun kissed, but sun raped. Oh, and what is the point of having the same pose in every profile picture? The kind of people who put 'You' in their mahossive list of hates. Yes, I have a gargantuan list, but do you see 'You' anywhere? Message me if you're one of them. In addition to the previous listed hate, those who name their favourite commenters. I don't give a toss who you dribble over and search desperately for in your spare time. Coffee = Yuck.
Thank you for taking your time to read this. If you're still here, well done. You get a hypothetical gold star.
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Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, I decided to start my exercise video routine. It's an African dance workout DVD. Just as I felt confident and motivated about getting in shape, I realized that my window was wide open and my neighbors were getting a front row seat to me waving my arms in the air like an idiot. FML
Today, I'm a student vet. Part of my holiday work is to gain experience working at a dairy. A cow came on to the platform for me to inject her udder. As I was bent over, she decided to take a dump. Onto my left eyeball. FML
Today, I was having some intense sex with my boyfriend. I was wailing so loud that my neighbors decided to call the police on us. According to them, it sounded like I was "being tortured to death". FML
Today, I was in IKEA when my friends and I thought it would be fun to play hide and seek. We all hid; I was in a good hiding spot. Half an hour later, I was still there. I texted my friends to see where they were. They all left to see a movie, and forgot about me. FML
Today, I overheard a conversation between a coworker and a new employee. The new girl was trying to get familiar with people's names, and she asked my coworker, "Which one is Heather?" He answered, "The annoying one." She said, "Oh, that's Heather." I'm Heather. FML
Monday 1 September 2014