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GossipGirlBitch
  • Town/Country : Sydney, Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 511
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About GossipGirlBitch : Cats need love too.

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GossipGirlBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML

#19164002
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24759) - you deserved it (4637)

On 02/25/2012 at 10:13pm - misc - by baconandkittens (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I told my mom about an article I'd seen that said people tend to make the most mistakes at 2 to 3 in the morning. Without a trace of humor in her voice, she said, "Tell me about it. You were conceived round about then." FML

#19161830
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22121) - you deserved it (2574)

On 02/25/2012 at 3:51pm - misc - by fmlsomuch - Japan

Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML

#19152060
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19112) - you deserved it (6133)

On 02/24/2012 at 3:40am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

#19063795
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31356) - you deserved it (2172)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:03am - health - by loveinanelevator (man) -

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6829) - you deserved it (48510)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, I drove into a cluster of dustbins thanks to my dozy cat who'd managed to get into my car, fall asleep, and wake up while I was driving to work. I lost control when I was startled by him staring at me in the rear-view mirror. FML

#18842582
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22239) - you deserved it (4712)

On 01/18/2012 at 6:30am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I left my empty shower running so I could pretend I didn't still live alone. FML

#18790783
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12877) - you deserved it (22022)

On 01/12/2012 at 10:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML

Today, I rode the public bus. When I got off, I put my hood up only to discover that the old man who sat behind me had used my hood as a trashcan for his gum and used Kleenex. I can't get the gum out of my hair. FML

#18482161
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28947) - you deserved it (2132)

On 12/11/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

#18418543
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50961) - you deserved it (5171) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/03/2011 at 11:24am - kids - by perenoel - France

Today, a neighbor came by while I was cooking. She asked for some of my cheese, so I gave her a big slice and told her I only had cheddar. She angrily refused to accept the slice, and made her way to my fridge. She then yelled at me for not having an assortment of cheeses. FML

#18253335
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26609) - you deserved it (2199)

On 11/15/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by SetoAyumi - United States (California)

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29345) - you deserved it (2426)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML

#18145406
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36938) - you deserved it (2711)

On 11/03/2011 at 5:18am - misc - by Grounded (woman) - United States

Today, at work, a customer asked for my number. When I declined, he made a huge scene, shouting and scaring other customers. He tipped me seven cents. FML

#17980865
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20981) - you deserved it (2064)

On 10/14/2011 at 5:35am - work - by scribbler8 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in English when I had to use the bathroom. As I was signing out, the teacher said "Don't forget the hall pass!" It was a plunger. I have to walk across my school with a plunger. FML

#17645605
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21813) - you deserved it (4447)

On 09/02/2011 at 4:44pm - misc - by d0rk_ - Canada (Quebec)



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