Futacy

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Futacy

31Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Boston, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 June 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8595
  • Number of comments : 1193
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 31 posted

About Futacy : Licking doorknobs is illegal in other planets. And apparently in Washington, DC as well. You'll be ask to leave the White House.

Futacy's page activity

Visits<b>Itineranthuman</b> - yesterday at 10:50pm<b>thebiteof87</b> - yesterday at 7:59pm<b>GoddammitHoward</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 12:20pm<b>Xenolythic</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 12:29am<b>joecool86</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 6:21pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 3:39pm<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 3:59am<b>Zanquis</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 6:28pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 3:30am<b>Thorne1227</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 8:36am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 1:50pm<b>HereToRuinFun</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 2:16pm<b>Roxas_hearts</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 10:41pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 2:54pm<b>ciaraash</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 6:18pm<b>KittyKatKyrish</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 2:06pm<b>MassiDelta</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 1:17pm<b>CamBen</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 4:47pm

Fucked!<b>Itineranthuman</b> - yesterday at 4:50am<b>GoddammitHoward</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 6:21pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 9:39pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 9:24pm<b>nottheuglyfriend</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 3:06am<b>acp2002</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 4:46am<b>elektra2</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 10:38pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 7:58am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 9:20pm<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:08pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 1:35am<b>Wolfipoo</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 10:31pm<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 6:44pm<b>patts_</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:49pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 4:21am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 12:41am<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:11pm<b>stoneq11</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 7:40pm

Futacy's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Futacy's badges

Futacy's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend called me freaking out because of an online pregnancy test. She was scared because she had no idea that she was pregnant, let alone having a fifteen pound baby. The website is a joke. She goes to an Ivy League school, and I couldn't even get into community college. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2009 at 12:21am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my dad has been having an affair. With my formerly favorite teacher. The best part? Yesterday, she announced to the class that she was pregnant. I clapped and congratulated her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 10:28pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of 7 years broke up with me in a text message. Then I found out from a mutual friend that he "came out" and told everyone at our school that he is gay. He has known he was gay for years and he was just using me as a cover up. What a great way to start my senior year. FML

by amanda_ae_erin / 11/09/2009 at 11:02pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I failed an oral speech because "I didn't look up once." The problem was, every time I looked up, my teacher looked down. Every time I looked down, she looked up. FML

by oralMistake / 10/26/2009 at 2:46pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

by treegirl / 07/26/2009 at 1:57am / United States / Love

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML

by shandrith / 07/03/2009 at 10:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I realized how much I hate my apartment. Not only can I hear my creepy upstairs neighbor having sex with random hookers every few night, I can also hear him everytime he takes a shit. I honestly don't know which is worse. FML

by Steph / 06/21/2009 at 8:05am / Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a hospital in Uganda, where I'm working with an NGO for the summer. I had a high fever and other symptoms of malaria. They gave me a test, and I don't have malaria. I am now however sick from the water they gave me to wash down a medication to reduce fever. FML

by MalariaFree / 06/14/2009 at 7:08am / Uganda (Kampala) / Health

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

by mcullen21 / 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, on the way to an exam I saw a car accident happen. I stopped, helped the woman who was injured and waited for the paramedics. I was too late at school, the teacher didn't buy my excuse and I failed the exam. It was an examination of my first aid skills. FML

by Sam / 05/19/2009 at 5:21am / Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my teachers asked me to babysit their kids saturday night. She didn't forget that it was Prom night, she was going to chaperone it. My teacher assumed I wasn't invited to Prom... I wasn't. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2009 at 6:44am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

by mehdi / 10/13/2008 at 4:20am / Miscellaneous

Today, at the cinema, I sat next to a guy who couldn’t stand a minute without laughing or making comments about the film. FML

by Cyberdeeder / 10/13/2008 at 4:19am / Work

Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction. He said, "I love Los Angeles too!" FML

by mocass’1 / 10/13/2008 at 4:19am / France / Love