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Futacy

Offline (the 03/25/2015 at 12:33am) | Search for a member

Futacy

14Liked!

  • Town/Country : Washington, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6849
  • Number of comments : 1130
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About Futacy : This member hasn't filled in the description because he is beyond describable.

Futacy's page activity

Visits<b>DarkAngel12346</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 4:19am<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 1:40pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 12:33am<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 11:45pm<b>alexishbu</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 9:46pm<b>mellajella</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 10:11pm<b>xReDMemory</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 3:08am<b>trbetit</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 2:24pm<b>Jason89</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 10:55pm<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 2:10pm<b>Raxy</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 7:00pm<b>laytay101</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 1:49pm<b>thepwny8</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 8:29pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 5:05pm<b>peacheso</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:53am<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 11:25pm<b>JulietMarie</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 6:48pm<b>becccers</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 11:31pm

Liked!<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:11pm<b>stoneq11</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 7:40pm<b>emmzy_em</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 7:45pm<b>aldos21</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 6:15am<b>Quantummonkeya</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 11:40pm<b>Epickitty58</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 8:09pm<b>JoeyTheJubilent</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 4:23am<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 5:08am<b>platinumbking</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 1:23pm<b>princessluka</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 7:41pm<b>tay_arredondo</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 1:00am<b>sbrown1234567890</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 12:44am<b>hope1103</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 3:21pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 4:56am

Futacy's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of Futacy's badges

Futacy's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm trying to come up with a plausible explanation for my co-workers as to why I have stitches in my face. I'm not sure I want to admit that I was clawed by a pigeon as I opened my garage door. FML

#16599419
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28617) - you deserved it (3575) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/10/2011 at 7:07pm - misc - by Anonyme - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I was at the park with my daughter. She walked up to a boy at the swings, held her hand out, and said, "Hi I'm Vanessa, and someday you'll be working for me." FML

#16591956
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32546) - you deserved it (12394)

On 06/10/2011 at 5:57am - kids - by Rachel (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

#16591385
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40683) - you deserved it (4464)

On 06/10/2011 at 4:09am - work - by lilben (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out in a motel room. Just before we really got started I noticed that I forgot to close the drapes. Once I got up to close them I saw 3 maids and the manager run away. FML

#16588229
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34105) - you deserved it (12058)

On 06/10/2011 at 12:08am - intimacy - by henry feingold - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML

#16551400
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35727) - you deserved it (7720)

On 06/07/2011 at 8:13pm - work - by Bee (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on for the first time. Just as I was about to climax, I spotted my greatest fear, a big wasp, only a few inches away from me. I shuddered and made a very unmanly orgasm wail. She now refuses to have sex because she says I "turned her off forever". FML

#16548173
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40535) - you deserved it (10947)

On 06/07/2011 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Punk (man) - United States

Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML

#16531182
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50513) - you deserved it (3725)

On 06/06/2011 at 3:00pm - misc - by Danielle - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to declare my love to the girl I have a crush on. I guess I shouldn't have gone and kissed her without warning, because now my face is covered with slap marks, and I had to explain myself at the police station for sexual harassement. FML

#16531117
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12701) - you deserved it (49698)

On 06/06/2011 at 2:55pm - love - by Someguy (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, I changed the date of my birthday to today on Facebook to see how many people actually know my birthday. My mom wished me a happy birthday. FML

#16527718
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43440) - you deserved it (14507)

On 06/06/2011 at 9:50am - misc - by Jake Whitte - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom looked through my browser history and saw Chatroulette. She thought I'd gotten into online gambling, and wouldn't believe me when I explained what it really was. After I insisted on showing her, the first chat window to open contained cocks as far as the eye could see. FML

#16488839
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21681) - you deserved it (38113)

On 06/03/2011 at 8:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my fiancé nervously sat me down for a "serious chat". The chat wound up with him asking if we could postpone our wedding, because his World of Warcraft guild had a raid scheduled for the same day. FML

#16487727
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51293) - you deserved it (9905)

On 06/03/2011 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML

#16351736
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44709) - you deserved it (6044)

On 05/26/2011 at 12:15am - intimacy - by blahblah493 - United States

Today, I was making out with this guy that I like. In an attempt to be romantic, he tried to pick me up and press me against the wall. He couldn't lift me off the ground. FML

#16213950
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39004) - you deserved it (14958)

On 05/16/2011 at 10:12pm - love - by Fatty (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting in the lecture hall. A girl walked by to get to her seat and her dress got caught on the handles, lifting it up. She didn't notice but I did, so I tried to take it off the handles. She turned around to see me holding her dress up. FML

#16153880
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34727) - you deserved it (7698)

On 05/13/2011 at 1:45am - misc - by ctop (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

#15921187
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37420) - you deserved it (19133)

On 04/25/2011 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Ouch (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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