About FBISurveillance : I enjoy looking at people's stories. It makes me feel better about my own life.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I received a visit from a social worker. My son told his teacher I was starving him, all because I refused to let him eat pizza and ice cream for breakfast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32202) - you deserved it (3119)
On 05/23/2011 at 7:58am - kids - by Bad Parent -
Today, while changing a light bulb, I was electrocuted. I screamed before I blacked out. My entire family was home and heard me scream, but didn't come and check because they were too busy watching Glee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35838) - you deserved it (5460)
On 05/10/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Burnt (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29103) - you deserved it (5748)
On 05/03/2011 at 1:01am - kids - by armywife980 -
Today, while snow plowing I accidentally ran over my kid's basketball. I told him what had happened and he responded by spilling his ant farm into my underwear drawer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22300) - you deserved it (5621)
On 01/13/2011 at 9:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30251) - you deserved it (49764)
On 12/11/2010 at 9:44am - kids - by parentfail (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I discovered my parents took me to a specialist when I was a baby because they thought I had a facial deformity. It turns out I'm just ugly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27112) - you deserved it (1963)
On 11/26/2010 at 7:23pm - misc - by bleh (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40469) - you deserved it (13598)
On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16472) - you deserved it (46591)
On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I popped a zit and I went to put my acne medicine on it. It's in a clear bottle with a blue cap, just like the nearby nailpolish remover. I grabbed the wrong one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18357) - you deserved it (9731)
On 08/22/2010 at 5:20pm - misc - by inseriouspain (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27130) - you deserved it (12843)
On 07/16/2010 at 3:45pm - misc - by liz - United States (California)
Today, I got called a "loser" by an old man wearing pink flip-flops and riding a purple moped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29959) - you deserved it (6764)
On 07/01/2010 at 11:19am - misc - by cooldude (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my husband decided he will be a 'stay at home' dad. We have two cats. No kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25770) - you deserved it (3190)
On 06/03/2010 at 3:44am - animals - by Kate - United States (Arizona)
Today, a bee landed on my leg. I didn't realize it was there until my friend yelled out, "Bee!" kicked me in the leg, and ran off. I fell to the ground screaming and clutching my leg. She missed the bee and it still stung me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20500) - you deserved it (1702)
On 05/29/2010 at 8:11am - misc - by hulagirl1217 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I told my mom I was 3 months pregnant, expecting her to be happy. Instead, she screamed that I was no longer her daughter and she never wanted to see me again before throwing me out of her house, because I got pregnant out of wedlock. Nice math mom. I've been married for 5 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29324) - you deserved it (1689)
On 03/07/2010 at 5:27am - misc - by notamathematician (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was in school and spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her I broke her nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8572) - you deserved it (23955)
On 02/17/2010 at 3:44pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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