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Crystal55621

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Crystal55621
  • Town/Country : Up your ass, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6902
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Crystal55621 : I'm not telling anything so....this was a waste of time. Enjoy your day!

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Crystal55621's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. The movie was in 3D, and he couldn't help but notice it would be much cooler if you could feel what the characters did. He spent the next two hours slapping me every time the person in the movie did, claiming the movie would be "better". FML

#20542280
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27030) - you deserved it (4283)

On 03/13/2013 at 5:06pm - misc - by bruised - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35331) - you deserved it (11298)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I moved back to my home town. My best friend and I had arranged to rent a house together that we both liked. I finished my last day at work and made the three-hour drive, only for her to break down and tell me that she isn't "ready" to move out of her parents' basement. She's 25. FML

#20540831
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26084) - you deserved it (1663)

On 03/12/2013 at 2:35pm - misc - by Hopelesshomeless (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I invited my long-lost best friend over, because I haven't seen her much since she got a new boyfriend. 20 minutes into hanging out, he showed up at my door. He still hasn't left, and they're having sex on my couch right now. FML

#20540616
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43961) - you deserved it (5861)

On 03/12/2013 at 9:22am - intimacy - by kenleybunch - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried to go to my Hotmail account on my boyfriend's computer. When I typed in "hot", a big history list came down. It was all "Hot single mom looking for a good lay" Craigslist ads. FML

#20540391
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25933) - you deserved it (2462)

On 03/12/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 4-year-old daughter couldn't sleep, crying that her teddy bear wants to eat her. My husband thought it would be funny to put the bear right in front of her face while she slept. She's now terrified to sleep anywhere but in our bed. FML

#20539958
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26474) - you deserved it (5283)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, thinking my girlfriend had left her little black thong in the dryer to tease me, I sent her a picture of me seductively posing with it. She didn't text back, but a few hours later my 16 year old daughter asked if she'd left anything in the dryer. FML

#20539833
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16295) - you deserved it (40793)

On 03/11/2013 at 5:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, since I hadn't eaten and was about to have a three hour class, I bought Panda Express. I sat opposite my classroom to eat. Soon after I started eating, a wad of saliva dropped into my bowl, and I heard someone yell "BONUS POINTS!" from the second floor. FML

Today, I figured I needed to clean my room. I ended up finding my $135 calculator that I'd accused my ex-boyfriend of selling for gas money. That's also the reason I dumped him. FML

#20539612
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6522) - you deserved it (50950)

On 03/11/2013 at 2:56pm - money - by supertango500 (woman) - United States

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

#20539287
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39664) - you deserved it (17100)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 3 year old woke up at 2 am and refused to go back to sleep unless she could sleep with her father and me. Normally we would have said no, but both of us being so tired, we said yes. She slowly kicked me out of my side of the bed and now I have to sleep on the couch. FML

Today, I went with my dad to Starbucks. There is this really cute guy who works there and he kept looking over at me, so I went over to say hi. He ended up asking if my dad was single. FML

#20538966
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35771) - you deserved it (3342)

On 03/11/2013 at 12:17am - love - by lonely girl - United States

Today, I was at the airport, when a lady came up and loudly asked if she could sit next to me. I have serious social issues, so to avoid having to talk to her, I pretended I was deaf and couldn't hear her. She immediately broke out her sign language skills. FML

#20538296
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11093) - you deserved it (33003)

On 03/10/2013 at 3:54pm - misc - by human lava lamp (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML

#20538070
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46827) - you deserved it (5651)

On 03/10/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by themouseman1212 - United States

Today, when I got home, my child had three bruises. My babysitter's excuse? "She hit me first". FML

#20538066
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40928) - you deserved it (3965)

On 03/10/2013 at 12:08pm - kids - by Amanda - Canada



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