About BloodFaerie : Just a girl...
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, it was my first day as a police officer. A couple of hours into the shift, we got a call. A man was drunkenly jeering and urinating on parked cars. That man turned out to be my father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30506) - you deserved it (2071)
On 09/20/2011 at 10:56am - work - by PC Jones (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6300) - you deserved it (33335)
On 09/18/2011 at 4:17pm - animals - by shithead (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23338) - you deserved it (6429)
On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19193) - you deserved it (3105)
On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26103) - you deserved it (4336)
On 09/15/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Scott - United States (California)
Today, I apologized to the cat for walking into the laundry room while he was using the litter box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17741) - you deserved it (6816)
On 09/13/2011 at 2:05am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12728) - you deserved it (27022)
On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17429) - you deserved it (3060)
On 09/06/2011 at 4:06am - work - by Shamed - United Kingdom
Today, my husband compared me to his parent's dog. Why? Because when I sleep I fart and scare myself awake... Just like his parents dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19750) - you deserved it (7001)
On 09/05/2011 at 3:19pm - animals - by anonomys (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my dog ran away. It was dark, so I couldn't see very well, but I ran after him anyway. Thinking I had caught up to him, I grabbed him. It wasn't my dog. It was a skunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22530) - you deserved it (3898)
On 09/05/2011 at 12:04am - animals - by stinky skunk - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was at the library, and had finally found the book I'd been looking for, when a man approaches me, says "The main character dies at the end", and walks away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25157) - you deserved it (2220)
On 09/03/2011 at 8:04pm - misc - by haha - United States (California)
Today, I was at a music festival, watching one of my favorite bands. The security guys were throwing water into the crowd to cool us down. I saw some about to be thrown by another fan, so I stood with my mouth open to catch some of it. I ended up with a face full of hot piss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24214) - you deserved it (16136)
On 09/02/2011 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29393) - you deserved it (3957)
On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, I ran into my father. He was drunk and singing in the street. At 1:25pm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20503) - you deserved it (1701)
On 09/01/2011 at 11:45am - misc - by DogDoingScience (man) - Czech Republic (Jihomoravsky kraj)
Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25048) - you deserved it (2204)
On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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