BloodFaerie

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BloodFaerie

33Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 16 November 1982 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5353
  • Number of comments : 159
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 21 posted

About BloodFaerie : Just a girl...

BloodFaerie's page activity

Visits<b>BrooklynGirl36</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 9:44pm<b>plan_Z</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 10:59am<b>Dilexar</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 7:04pm<b>bronxiecat777</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 7:08am<b>FacePalm92</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 11:09am<b>Ze_Torch</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 2:58pm<b>Syntax58</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 6:56pm<b>Jakerssss</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 11:20am<b>Mafia_</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:13pm<b>DrSkillz</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 11:46am<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 6:43am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 1:05am<b>renafire</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 12:17am<b>aperson69</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 5:50pm<b>UberMom</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 1:23pm<b>ghdflkmmm</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 12:53pm<b>Flippier999</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 6:06am<b>Garagedwella</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 2:32am

Fucked!<b>Dilexar</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 1:04am<b>Syntax58</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 12:56am<b>UberMom</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 7:23pm<b>ghdflkmmm</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 6:53pm<b>kamdoodle</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 8:30am<b>Rais</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 10:57pm<b>hereforfmls</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 4:01pm<b>rogwest</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 6:10am<b>iNinetails</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 4:55am<b>w0nderwh4t</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 2:28am<b>vh_musiclover</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 1:52am<b>Lalagirl58</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 12:33am<b>eternal_screams</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 11:38pm<b>DandoMclovin</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 10:58pm<b>billboob</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 10:49pm<b>lambda</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 9:19pm<b>hiddenUSERNAME</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 8:44pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 8:03pm

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BloodFaerie's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my sister stopped by to visit me with her pet bird in tow. She asked me to hold the animal while she went to the toilet, and put it on my shoulder. It promptly shat on my only clean shirt and tore away a good deal of skin from my hand when I tried to get it off me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2012 at 7:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend learned that calling someone a "stupid bitch" under your breath while staring right at them from six feet away works very differently in my house than at hers. She also learned my sister has one hell of a punch. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2012 at 7:01am / United States / Intimacy

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

by thekriss / 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm / Love

Today, I packed my bags and left for the airport. When I passed through security, the X-ray scanner discovered that my cat had also come along for the ride. FML

by tal / 08/22/2012 at 5:57am / France / Animals

Today, I realized the fastest way to wake up isn't from an alarm clock. It's from the warm, wet sensation of your old and senile cat peeing on you and your bed. I swear he was smiling. FML

by jenA / 08/21/2012 at 9:04am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 1:59am / United States / Animals

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML

by TheCerealKiller / 08/07/2012 at 5:19am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

by ambushcat / 07/05/2012 at 11:31pm / United States / Animals

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

by mommabuser / 07/01/2012 at 11:59am / Animals

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

by pissed off / 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm / Animals

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML

by anonymous / 06/26/2012 at 2:05am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML

by hakura madada / 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm / Japan (Tokyo) / Miscellaneous