Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (17359) - you totally deserved it (66338)
On 03/09/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by Ethan (man) - Australia (Queensland)
what the fuckk?
how is a pearl necklace a present for her?
if anything thats a present for you.
i sincerely hope you got her something else.
#141 - On 06/30/2009 at 1:53pm by stinkybutt
Dude... sounds better than Dirty Sanchez or something like that.
#3 - On 03/09/2009 at 2:54pm by rebboy_2008
hmmm... you think her dad knew what you ment?? LOL sooo funny.... you did get her a gift though right??
#4 - On 03/09/2009 at 2:56pm by shady_angel
Dude, hope her parents didn't understand!
Also, you shouldn't give her false expectations... I guess now you have to buy her a pearl necklace... uh, I mean with real pearls X-D!
Why would she know what you meant? Let's go through the conversation. What did you get me for my birthday? I'm going to shoot my load on your neck/chest. Now gauge the excitement upon hearing this news and discover that you're a douche. lol.
And her dad knew what it meant, didn't he?
If you use such euphemisms you need to make sure that the other person knows what you're talking about. Did she know that you were intending to blow a load on her face and neck? Or were you just going to spring that on her?
You Massengill factor is off the charts. Truly a douche of the worst sort.
haha this literally made me lol.
I can see the mix up, but I guess next time explain better?
#16 - On 03/09/2009 at 3:30pm by simplethings7
well, did you get her anything other than sexual favors? if not, then you should buy her a real pearl necklace for making her think you had something great to give her.
#19 - On 03/09/2009 at 3:37pm by AntiqueTurquiose
#21, nah its just discusting, look at it frm the gfs point of view.....i agree with #12
#22 - On 03/09/2009 at 3:51pm by shady_angel
needless to say she didn't receive her present after that spectacular surprise
#24 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:03pm by TheAntiComment
Dude, you're going to have to go out and buy her an actual pearl necklace now, if you ever want to save face with the Dad. That way she can show it off to him, and he'll breathe a sigh of relief.
#25 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:05pm by calikola
haha that's funny shit, i think that you should hurry and buy her a real one, so she's not disappointed. even if she does like a load shot on her neck, she is probably disappointed she didn't get an ACTUAL necklace.
why would that be a good present for her??
and at #7, if she did enjoy that sort of thing she would probably know what a peal necklace was and would have been excited for it and known not to say anything to her dad, but i have no idea what girl would ewww
#27 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:06pm by vitaminsandminer
I think that's disgusting and I totally agree with #12. You're a douche.
#29 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:22pm by SuzieLovesYou
Well now you have to get a real one, or you're probably gonna get beaten up a fair bit.
#31 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:32pm by arms_akimbo
AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
holy shit, that has to be one of the funniest ones!!!
#32 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:36pm by IAlwaysFail
I'm with #7. I don't understand why most of you here think he's a douche or why you think it's disgusting. My girlfriend digs stuff like that. It's mostly just a play on submissive and subservient behavior. There are plenty of girls that like being dominated/used. Some of you are just ignorant.
just throwing this out there...but why is this a gift for her? should she be stoked you're going to blow your load all over her chest and neck?
#36 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:59pm by kels
#33- Dude, I like that stuff, too, but I still want something nice on my birthday.
#37 - On 03/09/2009 at 4:59pm by imajinethat
ditto #38.
I hope you got her something else along with...that.
#39 - On 03/09/2009 at 5:04pm by pineapple18
To be frank, the girl sounds like an idiot. I can picture the tone you made the initial pearl necklace statement in, and if I'm right, no way should the girl have seen it as a promise for an actual pearl necklace. She should have known it was something else, and even if she didn't know the double entendre, she should have had the sense to not mention it to daddy. Break up with her and find someone else. She's a dipshit.
#40 - On 03/09/2009 at 5:04pm by pal5017
I don't find anything particularly wrong with the act, but I do think you are a moron if you somehow think that it should qualify as a gift for her. And if she thought you meant a literal pearl necklace, then your delivery was also pathetic.
Not gunna lie but I enjoy it when I get a pearl necklace, sry if I'm gross or givin women a bad name but I don't have ANY complaints from my guy givin it to me haha.
On the other hand me n my friends jokingly told our other friend that her bf got her a pearl necklace and we all laughed, she seriously informed us that she didn't think she'd look good in a pearl necklace, we were all pretty quiet after her, moronic comment. Haha
#44 - On 03/09/2009 at 5:21pm by countrygal926
Hahaha guess that's just somethin else guys look for in a girl haha along with a big chest and nice butt haha
#47 - On 03/09/2009 at 5:36pm by countrygal926
maybe she did know what u were talkin about and thought it would be funny to say to dad cuz he wouldnt know what it really meant?
#49 - On 03/09/2009 at 5:58pm by sunshyne84
#12 is hilarious.
But at the same time, you probably should've made sure she understood... also def. go out and buy her something if you plan on continuing to see this girl.
#51 - On 03/09/2009 at 6:37pm by MercWithTheMouth
Wow... That's something you should get for your b-day...
Look, the 'privilage' to have cum blasted all over her chest is NOT a birthday gift. In fact, it sounds more like what happens during rape/a bad porno than a b-day gift :/
#55 - On 03/09/2009 at 7:54pm by such_is_life
ew, you should have specified. poor girl. some birthday she'll have.
#56 - On 03/09/2009 at 8:12pm by anicolelove
I dunno, if she didn't know what it meant, it might mean that she doesn't want to...? Whatever, it sounds like more of a birthday present for YOU and not for her. FHL.
lol! that's SO funny. You'll look back at this in 1 week and laugh too.
#61 - On 03/09/2009 at 9:37pm by koalaberry18
rut roh haha thats funny. could be a bit of a surprise, but hella funny.
#63 - On 03/09/2009 at 11:10pm by ned_schneebley
How is that a present. She has to titfuck you to get it. Its not a gift if you have to work for it!
#66 - On 03/09/2009 at 11:36pm by Imthatgirlthere
XD That's hilarious. Even more hilarious if he actually knew what you meant. If my boyfriend said he was going to give me a pearl necklace I would HOPE his meaning is the same as yours. :P
#67 - On 03/09/2009 at 11:50pm by TheNameless
THIS!!! BAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! This is the best FML I have ever read.
#68 - On 03/09/2009 at 11:59pm by ahhhlookout
I'm not gonna lie, I didn't know what that meant! haha
I have had it done to me before though and it's not gross or disgusting. Anyways, if you don't like it just lie on top of him and wipe it off onto him :P
Hmmm i just found out what a pearl necklace is.. ugh.. i will never look at any necklace the same..
#70 - On 03/10/2009 at 12:37am by that734chic
Hi guys,
Thanks for finding the funny side of this one... and the funny replies... I really did think at the time though that she understood what I had meant, well she laughed a bit and I laughed back. ah well.
Because of what happened though she did indeed end up with a real Pearl Necklace (just for Dads sake)
#74 - On 03/10/2009 at 4:57am by pearlnecklace
It's HER birthday and you're gonna cum on her neck? Shouldn't her birthday be about HER? I don't wanna spend my birthday completely unsatisfied and wiping my neck with copious amounts of paper towels.
#76 - On 03/10/2009 at 1:27pm by Hullaballoo
lol!! wow. I'm going to say you definitely deserved that, but only because of context. If it was your birthday, and someone said they were going to give you a Pearl Necklace, you'd probably think it was a real necklace, because you would be expecting a gift on your birthday. However, any other day of the year I'm sure she would have gotten your true meaning ;)
But anyway, I'm sure that was fun to clear up
"Honey, where's my pearl necklace?"
"Uh...well......about that..."
FYL if the dad knew what you meant though!
#77 - On 03/10/2009 at 1:32pm by choppedNskrewed
dude you're a fucken douche have some respect im sure a girl doesnt want want cum all over her neck, i wouldnt..oh and go buy her the pearl necklace or you're screwed
wow. just wow. But coming from a girl, I wouldn't mind it. I mean.. I would have wanted an actual gift to go with it though.
and #81, he replied (#74) saying he got her a real one.
#82 - On 03/10/2009 at 7:04pm by simplethings7
that sound like a gift for you not her....
i hope her dad doesn't beat the crap out of you even though he should for you disrespecting his daughter like that.
.. i agree with number 12
Also, some people on FML are uptight when it comes to sexual behaviour... lighten the fuck up, you'd find out you actually DO like a lot of the stuff you're now condemning if you'd only give it a try.
ya'll need to get off your high horses.
this is hilarious.
#89 - On 03/11/2009 at 1:03am by johnishotsauce
HAHA, you should've worked out by her reaction if she knew what "pearl necklace" meant!
Either that or she's incredibly snaky & trying to get that gift out of you.
Either way - hilarious.
I'd break up with my bf if he wants to give me something like *that* for my birthday.
(I didn't know what it is either until I looked it up...)
If my boyfriend told me he was going to give me a pearl necklace, even if he had a real pearl necklace wrapped up ready to give me i would jokingly by like "oh yeah." in a suggestive tone, but hey maybe thats just me
#96 - On 03/12/2009 at 11:29am by countrygal926
all you people need to lighten up and I think that was funny as hell. i just wish i was at the table so i could have seen the expression on you face cause that would have been priceless.
that's a little douchey not gonna lie....but as long as you had a legitimate present for her that makes it a bit better. though i'm sure when she found out you'd be shit out of luck, at least for a while
#101 - On 03/14/2009 at 8:32pm by just_my_life
That's actually the funniest thing ever.
But you're pretty stupid. I'm sure she really appreciates having to do shit to you and then have you cum all over her as her birthday present.
I'm hoping you weren't a complete douche and got her an actual present.
Pure awesome. And by the way commentors, some girls do like that stuff, so chill with the uptightness.
Ethan, you sound like an upstanding young man. However, I can not believe what a conniving bitch your girlfriend is. If my girlfriend ever tried to pull a switcheroo like that on me, just to finagle a real present out of me, I would have been livid. I envy your chivalry.
I read that you ended up giving her a real pearl necklace just to save face with her dad. You are an absolute Prince among Princes. I would have given her nothing but the previously promised metaphorical "pearl necklace", unless she begged me for forgiveness that is, then I would have thrown in a Shamwow. They hold 20 times their weight in "pearl necklaces"!
#105 - On 03/16/2009 at 12:05am by GravyCannon
funny, really funny! i can imagine her Dad saying: "well, that's a very nice present, you and Mom can wear it both" LOL!
hahahaht this is hilarious. my bf can give me a pearl necklace anytime he wants. im all for it! i mean, come on now, girls. a guys fantasy isnt gonna be making passionate love in a bed of roses with classical music softly playing in the background and ....?!? f that! pearl necklace all the damn way.
#114 - On 03/20/2009 at 11:30pm by letsX19
I love you 114, really I do, and I wouldn't just say that if I didn't mean it. Trust me.
Can I be your bf, if only for 30 to 45 minutes? I promise I'll be faithful. And I'll even bring you a brand new roll of Bounty paper towels (the quicker picker upper), or a spoon; your choice.
Damn, listen to me whispering sweet nothings... I can't help it, I suppose I'm just a hopeless romantic.
#115 - On 03/21/2009 at 7:01am by GravyCannon
If the only thing you were going to give your girlfriend for her birthday
was a sexual act what which gives her no pleasure, you're a fuckstick
who deserves to be castrated in front of his parents.
#116 - On 03/22/2009 at 1:39am by FuckedRoyally
ahahaha... comeon... it is a little bit funny! just laugh it off... so what if she didnt know wwhat it was, everyone has to find out some time or another!! hahahah
#117 - On 03/22/2009 at 6:30am by take_me_home
u idiots are calling him a douche when he said he really did get her a present (#74). That was just a bonus...I woulda enjoyed a pearl necklace from my man. I laughed so hard when I read this!!
Like 80% of the stories on here are fake. Some people just try to be funny.
#120 - On 03/29/2009 at 11:12am by fudgemylife12
Uh, yeah, there are some girls who are into that, but... if she didn't even know what the term meant, what are the odds that she's one of them? Slim. Very, very slim.
Even if she does like that sort of thing, shouldn't you do something special for her birthday? Something that doesn't involve shooting semen at her, I mean. Idiot.
#123 - On 04/03/2009 at 5:34pm by IntoRapture
so did she end up liking it or did you get punched in the balls?
#128 - On 04/18/2009 at 6:52pm by Newtons_Cradle
Sorry, didn't see that the first message sent! But still laughing!
#133 - On 05/01/2009 at 10:12pm by swompgurl29
"Today, was my birthday. My boyfriend promised me a pearl necklace. We went out for dinner with my parents, I told my dad the news. Little did I know, my boyfriend wanted to squirt on my neck and face! FML!"
You're a pig!
#139 - On 06/07/2009 at 5:41am by silly_kate
I actually had to google that.
After my little search, I can now conclude that you're a disgusting pig.
Yeah, some gift. >.>
