Today, I was on the toilet when my 6 year old daughter came in... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By "Omar Khalaf" - 12/10/2017 09:09

Today, I was on the toilet when my 6 year old daughter came in and asked why I was using so much toilet paper. I have OCD and have to use 8 pieces to wipe (don't judge me) but I was feeling funny "I have a big bum" and her reply was "yes but I think you should use 100 pieces cus it's so big". FML

I agree, your life sucks 51

You deserved it 11

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

Keywords

Love Friends Teenagers Sex Intimacy Embarrassing Food Revenge Work Awkward Parents Relatable Weird Miscellaneous Health Job interview Jealousy Social Media Facebook Relationship advice Kids AITA Annoying Roommate Shoes Names Music Customers Education Capitalism

The Top

Today, it's my birthday, and I had one to many and my best friend and my boyfriend had to take me home. We went back to my apartment and all squeezed together in my bed. During the night I got sick and spent the rest of the night on the bathroom floor. Later I found out that they'd fucked in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 419

You deserved it 365

Today, I asked a girl at work out, who'd claimed she was single. Not ten minutes later, our boss fired me. Turns out that girl is actually his side chick he cheats on his wife with, even though she’s 19 and he’s 48. Not illegal, just scummy as hell, and he fired me out of jealousy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 100

The Top

Today at 10:00 pm, someone rang my doorbell 4 times, while I was sleeping. I thought it was an emergency and I opened the door to my neighbor who just want to ask if I had a blackout at noon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 868

You deserved it 151

Today, my next-door neighbor decided to become a rapper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 443

You deserved it 2 081

Today, the guy I liked came over for dinner with some friends. One of them asked him if we were dating, he became so distraught he started to choke on the food I had made, in his haste to tell them that in no uncertain terms, were we together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 492

You deserved it 4 174

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 327

You deserved it 4 844

Today, at work, I was putting away clothes in the Men's department, when a guy came and started shopping in the aisle in front of me. He kept staring at me non-stop. Getting fed up, I said "What are you staring at?" Turns out he was wearing his sunglasses on the back of his head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 288

You deserved it 64 670

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 568

You deserved it 65 202