Mr Sydney west, Australia 33 years-old It's complicated
Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML
Today, my friends and me had a little water balloon fight and somehow it led to throwing water balloons at cars. We all decided to hit a car all at once, after one came by we all hit it. The car stopped and started flashing bright blue lights. We ended up hitting an off-duty police car. FML
Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML
Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML
Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML
Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I walked on my balcony only to find my boyfriend throwing rocks trying to wake me. He didn't see me and threw a rock right into my eye. FML
Today, my apartment burned to the ground. I was packed and ready to move out tomorrow. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, I was passed over for the job of my dreams. I now have to watch as a girl I have on Facebook - a total moron - boasts daily about scoring the position instead. Turns out the interviewer was her uncle. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
