Mrs Miamisburg 46 years-old
Today, I broke my toe. After telling my friend about it, he promptly stomped on it to "see what my reaction would be." FML
Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML
Today, my friend asked why I always smell like a dead animal carcass. I have no idea. FML
Today, my wife checked the time while we were having sex. Twice. FML
Today, I was patting my kitten who was asleep underneath the blanket on my lap. My roommate walked in and gave me disgusted look. She thought I was playing with myself. FML
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