Today, we spread my uncle's ashes at my grandparents' house. We were on a hill overlooking a sunset. It was a beautiful ceremony… until the winds changed direction. Our whole family wound up covered in my Uncle. He's still stuck in my hair. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at my grandad's funeral, as my dad and aunt poured his ashes into the hole, a strong gust of wind blew the ashes into my throat. I choked on my grandad. What made it worse was that the vicar had to stop her prayer to laugh. FML
Today, was my uncle's funeral. He was cremated, and his wish was to have his ashes spread into the sea. As we were waiting for the waves to come and take him away, a group of seagulls came by picking at all his ashes. I guess he tasted good. FML
Today, it was my uncle's funeral. As we were in the cars behind the hearse, I lost sight of it in traffic, ended up taking a wrong turn, and getting lost… As did half the cars behind me, who also didn’t know where the crematorium was, and just kept following me. We delayed the funeral quite a bit. FML
Today, we went to disperse my father's ashes in his favorite lake. My brother was anxious to show off to his new wife, and took us to a fancy resort on the lake. He fell into the lake with my dad's ashes. Nobody laughed when he got out. Oh and as he's a stingy ass, I ended up paying for the trip. FML
Today, my uncle was supposed to be the officiant at my wedding but he and my dad teamed up to make a joke about how this was actually my fiancé's funeral. Everyone laughed, except my fiancé. He burst into tears and ran from the altar. We can’t find him and he’s not answering his phone. FML
Today, my uncle died. It was also my grandpa's 85th birthday. His reaction to the death? "Best birthday gift ever!" FML
Today, I took home my grandpa's ashes. I then went out with my grandma, leaving my 5-year-old at home with my 12-year-old. When I got home, my beaming 5-year-old opened the door, covered in white powder. My grandmother asked where all the powder had come from. She pointed to the empty ashbox. FML
Today, I went to my uncle's funeral. His eulogy was ruined by an annoying little kid repeatedly talking over the pastor, who didn't pause for anything, no matter how many times his parents told him to stop. The complimentary lunch was horrible, and the hearse driving him to the cemetery got into an accident. FML
Today, after I found out my uncle took me off my grandma's funeral program, I had to fight to speak. He spent the week taking out his jealousy and anger on me and my sister for being included in her funeral. To everyone else he's played the saint, and the whole family has no idea. FML
Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML
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Top comments
Mykeh 0
Wow, looks like your uncle has seperation anxiety. You should feel blessed, it was a gesture of love on his part. Unless he's one of those annoying uncles in which case he came onto you as a prank.
ncochrum 0
It's raining men!
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Comments (121)
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Maybe he wanted to stay close to you all! :) In some native tribes in South America, it used to be a religious practice to eat some of your dead loved one's ashes after cremation, so that they'd be a part of you instead of just go away buried in the Earth. I don't think people still do that nowadays, but it's beautiful. In many ways, it's the same as Catholic Communion, only, done to be one with your loved one instead of with Jesus Christ. It's true and it's not anti-religious in any way, by the way. I learned this from a Catholic priest who used to be a missionaire studying the tribes, in case anyone feels like flaming me for this simple comment. >XD *lol*
Kate528 0
Fake.
Jackie10 0
wow. that really sucks. should have did it one a non-windy day. =[
Jackie10 0
wow. that really sucks. should have did it one a non-windy day. =[
Ub3r_Crippl3 0
:( Take solace in that he would probably laugh about it were he alive.
NGM_47 0
LMAO!
pikL3bOi 0
#8 I'm with u
FreedomFirst 0
If he's anything like my uncle, he probably did it on purpose.
littlemuffet 0
Is your uncle Steve Buscemi?
rachel_renegade 0
Donny was a good bowler, and a good man. He was one of us. He was a man who loved the outdoors... and bowling, and as a surfer he explored the beaches of Southern California, from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo and... up to... Pismo. He died, like so many young men of his generation, he died before his time. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him, as you took so many bright flowering young men at Khe Sanh, at Langdok, at Hill 364. These young men gave their lives. And so would Donny. Donny, who loved bowling. And so, Theodore Donald Karabotsos, in accordance with what we think your dying wishes might well have been, we commit your final mortal remains to the bosom of the Pacific Ocean, which you loved so well. Good night, sweet prince.