Today, the cat was screaming for canned food. To save the ears of everyone in the house, I decided to give him what he wanted. When I popped the lid, it squirted stinky cat-food gravy all over my shirt. When I tried to remove the shirt, it all went inside my pants. FML
Coyote
CoyoteOldOne tells us more.
CoyoteOldOne 17
I am an uncontrolled human. The cat is uncontrolled also. Cat food doesnt smell nice to me, and it was a strong, wet, meaty smell. Dammit, that came out bad too. Maybe i should work at one of those phone sex lines.
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Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Top comments
Tripartita 45
It’s not often you read an FML that could be either a cat food ad or the premise of soft core ****. “I decided to give him what he wanted. When I popped … it squirted … all over my shirt.”
somedudesomewher 29
Do you live in an infomercial?
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Comments (28)
exileonmainst 16
That story is pre-paw-sterous. At least your cat is feline better now.
Dave_Davington 34
You've still got it, I see.
PennyLane27 32
It's a cat-tastrophy!
exileonmainst 16
Help meowt! I cat stop!
RichardPencil 32
You can get the cat to lick it off. If anybody sees you, you’ll probably go to jail.
CoyoteOldOne 17
And now you're going to hell. ;)
Glowworm56 27
So you gave your cat some food so the rest of your family wouldn't have to tuna him out?
somedudesomewher 29
Do you live in an infomercial?
CoyoteOldOne 17
Apparently not, because nobody popped put with a miracle product to save me from my clumsy man hands. I miss Ron Popeil. Not that shamwow guy though. He was a little disturbing.
Tripartita 45
It’s not often you read an FML that could be either a cat food ad or the premise of soft core ****. “I decided to give him what he wanted. When I popped … it squirted … all over my shirt.”
vandj8 9
Don't forget....and then, it all went down my pants.
CoyoteOldOne 17
Obviously, i should be more careful how I word things...
gar2014 23
there's so many thoughts that went through my mind when reading this lol , but just laugh at it cause it's funny , we can all agree ?
Lobby_Bee 18
How are they stinky? Canned cat food is taste tested by a controlled human being before being approved for sale.
CoyoteOldOne 17
I am an uncontrolled human. The cat is uncontrolled also. Cat food doesnt smell nice to me, and it was a strong, wet, meaty smell. Dammit, that came out bad too. Maybe i should work at one of those phone sex lines.
kiwienne 21
yes, nothing sexier than being told you have a "strong, wet, meaty scent to you" ;). Ooff.
Notmymonkeysnotmycircus 16
I have a feeling the cat set you up. Which just reaffirms my life long belief that cats are assholes.
anyoldnamewilldo 23
Been there and done that. Sorry OP
katluvr 22
I've had cats a long as I can remember (and I'm old) and I cannot begin to imagine how you accomplished this feat. Perhaps someone should help you tend to the kitties...
CoyoteOldOne 17
I agree. Apparemtly, i am not up to the task.