Animals: Today, my cat sat on my lap and attacked me every single time... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Anonymous - 14/08/2017 01:41 - United States - Trenton

Today, my cat sat on my lap and attacked me every single time I tried to move her. I was stuck like that for 3 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47

You deserved it 40

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

GhostFox 33

Friday 18 August 2017 16:27

Sounds like she might have been in pain or not feeling well. Take her to the vet soon- she could have a UTI, could have fractured something, or it could be something worse.

GhostFox 33

Friday 18 August 2017 16:54

Sounds like she might have been in pain or not feeling well. Take her to the vet soon- she could have a UTI, could have fractured something, or it could be something worse.

Comments

GhostFox 33

Friday 18 August 2017 16:27

Sounds like she might have been in pain or not feeling well. Take her to the vet soon- she could have a UTI, could have fractured something, or it could be something worse.

GhostFox 33

Friday 18 August 2017 16:54

Sounds like she might have been in pain or not feeling well. Take her to the vet soon- she could have a UTI, could have fractured something, or it could be something worse.

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Instagram I need your advice Love Ghosting Social Media Miscellaneous Swimming pool Gross Bodyshaming Anxiety Mental health School Education Embarrassing Parents Awkward Cleaning Family Weird Football Sports Cheating Ironic Relatable Allergies Kids Trust Suspicious Pregnancy Insects

The Top

Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 600

You deserved it 98

Today, I was at the airport, on my way to see my dad for the first time since I was four years-old. Whilst I was waiting for my dad to find me, a strange man started flirting with me. Irritated, I told him I was waiting for my dad to get me, and to fuck off. The strange man was my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 222

You deserved it 4 216

Random

Today, I saw two kids having a fistfight in the street. I ran over to stop them, and one ended up hitting me in the eye. I now have a black eye over what turned out to have been a fight over who was going to get the last slice of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 783

You deserved it 9 782

Today, my brother decided deodorant causes cancer. He goes to the gym every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 971

You deserved it 2 519

Today, my boyfriend gave me a bucket of Twizzlers for our one year anniversary because "He knew I liked them." He has no idea why I am so upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 610

You deserved it 47 440

Today, every time I practice my synthesizer, without fail, my stepmom decides to make as much noise as humanly possible. Slamming doors, stomping around in her loudest heels, dropping weights, screaming, you name it. I can hear her through my noise cancelling headphones and I can’t focus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 174

Today, I finally finished a drawing of a tiger. The only thing left to do is write the word "Tiger" in Sanskrit and glitter on the portrait, because I thought it would look cool. Only to find out, the Sanskrit word for tiger is "Viagra." No, I'm not kidding. This portrait took me numerous tries and several weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 400

Today, after fasting for 24 hours and drinking 2 buckets of laxatives, my doctor's office notified me that my colonoscopy had been cancelled. I'd just finished the prep by taking the fart pills, and now have the cleanest colon ever. A lot of time spent on the toilet that I’ll never get back though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 081

You deserved it 127