Today, my car died on a major road, a cop pulled over to help, he offered to jump me, while doing so because my battery was so dead he told me to put the gas on the floor, I did and my car roared to life, he then pulled me over five feet from where my car died to give me a ticket for a loud exhaust. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after my car died a mile from my house, I huffed, puffed and pushed it back to my house off the street, so I wouldn't get a ticket overnight. After getting it towed to the shop in the morning, I got a call telling me they put gas in it for me and it starts up fine now. FML
Today, a guy's car broke down in my street, so I helped him push it into my driveway, checked his car out, and gave it a jump start. He thanked me, then as he went to pull out, he instead smashed straight into my car. FML
Today, my friend's van ran out of gas on an expressway off-ramp. After pushing it to the shoulder, we walked to a gas station and got a can of gas. We got back to the van to find that the battery had died from leaving on the lights and hazards to avoid an accident. FML
Today, while I was driving, a police officer jumped out from the sidewalk and into my lane. I slammed on the brakes so I wouldn't hit him. He then gave me a ticket for "obstructing traffic." FML
Today, I went out to my car only to find my battery had died the night before. With the wind chill, it was -20°F outside. With the hood open, and jumper cables in one hand, I tried to flag down a passing motorist for help. A man in a truck slowed down, sarcastically waved at me, and kept driving. FML
Today, a cop almost rear-ended my car, slammed on the gas with no warning, swerved around me, flipped me the bird, then cut me off and then drove a full ten miles under the speed limit. When I changed lanes to overtake him, he pulled me over for road rage. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
Today, while driving on the tollway my car overheated and died a few yards from the toll booth. I then had to wait, crying, in my smoking car for a patrol guy while cars moved around me. He had to push me through the toll and the lady in the booth said she felt sorry for me but still took my $3. FML
Today, I was driving to a gas station because I'd noticed I was almost on empty. Literally a block away from the gas station, my car broke down in the middle of an intersection, and I had to push my car to the side of the road, only to be questioned by police for "suspicious behavior." FML
Today, I picked up my car from the repair shop, drove two miles, and ran out of gas. I then walked to get gas, put a gallon of gas in the car, and tried to start it. The battery was too weak to start the car, and died on the spot. FML
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Top comments
AlexV_fml 0
AHHH WHAT A JERK!! i hate cops lol FYL
xClarkGable 0
People who hate cops usually just say that because they've been caught doing something wrong. There's nothing wrong with cops.
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Comments (201)
Darkon 0
@22 So says the person with no punctuation, capitalization or knowing how to spell 'grammar'?
BaglMinionz 8
You might want to work on your comma placement as well.
mintfreshpinesol 0
This was written so badly.
Hazza_69 1
l0l
the_holy_one 0
hahaha that sucks BIG time. but, u got owned xD
Atreyu_Love 0
This is horrible FML, with poor grammar, and therefore making it a run on sentence as well. It doesn't even say today..
PresidentNorth 16
Please find something better to do than call out flaws. Ride a bike or something.
Taihen 0
#14: I won't claim to hate cops, but I tend to dislike them. I'm a person who doesn't get in trouble with the cops, but I've seen too much shit go down with them to like them. The cops several times refused to arrest my neighbors who were using illegal drugs and drinking underage because they were friends. I've seen several local cops buying drugs and doing drugs, never turning in the drug dealers. I've also seen cops put on their lights just so that they can drive around people and such and then turn them off. I can respect that cops put their lives on the line at times and work to make our world better. However, I cannot respect power trips and all that they try to pull that's illegal and immoral. I respect firefighters to no end, they put their lives on the line and all the ones I know don't have issues with respecting other people or power trips that involve yelling at others or going out of line.
_HollieWould 0
LOL what a dick! hm well i guess that's what cops do best =)
HerrKevin 0
I hate unnecessarily loud exhausts. It's your own damn fault for installing a stupid exhaust.
Ranajet 0
No 'today', not 'today'!
blouuu_fml 0
Can a car battery die WHILE driving? I never heard of that. I had to have my old car jump-started a few years ago, and the AAA assistant told me to drive at least 30 minutes before I stopped the engine again, so that the battery could charge itself. Also, you deserve the ticket if you do have a loud exhaust. Pay it and stop complaining about cops doing a job that sometimes really, really sucks.
Tarran 3
your car battery can die when your driving if your alternator is malfunctioning or not working properly, the alternator provides all the electrical power to the car when it's running, also the alternator charges the battery, it doesn't charge itself, just sayin