Today, I went to interview with potential new roommates at a cooperative living house. I decided to bake cookies for everyone, and while touring the house, I forgot about the cookies and set off a small oven fire. All this after professing how responsible I am. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took an IQ test and ended up scoring above average. Feeling good about myself, I decided to bake some cookies. After 30 minutes of them not doing anything in the oven, I realized I forgot to turn the oven on. FML
Today, as I was making biscuits my mom joked, "Don't burn the house down." I told her "Don't worry, I know how to make biscuits." The oven caught fire. FML
Today, I told my crush I’d bring homemade cookies. The batch burned so badly the smoke alarm screamed. In desperation, I bought store cookies, put them on a tray, and claimed them as mine. My crush said, “These taste store-bought.” I panicked and confessed. FML
Today, my apartment smelled like something was burning, so I checked the oven, toaster, outlets, and even the hallway. After an hour, I discovered the smell was coming from the candle I had forgotten I'd lit in the bathroom. I had spent an hour investigating a fire that wasn't happening. FML
Today, I opened a bag of flour a little too enthusiastically and it blew up. The resulting cloud of flour set off my smoke alarm. My neighbors then came knocking, wondering if the building was on fire, while I stood there looking like I'd been pranked by a baker. FML
Today, after meaning to do so for a while, I began cleaning my oven. I sprayed it with the foam cleaner stuff, closed the oven for the foam to soak in, then forgot about the whole thing. Later, I preheated the oven for a pizza and triggered a smoke alarm, which brought the fire department to my door. No pizza, just shame. FML
Today, I baked a cake. After feeding it to my entire family, I opened the stove, planning to temporarily store the cake inside. I then noticed a mouse, burnt to a crisp. FML
Today, I was trying to cook a pizza for lunch at my in-laws. I preheated the oven and took my dog out to go potty. I come back in to find the house filled with smoke, the detector going off, and a fire in the oven. Apparently, my mother-in-law left a tray of glass candle holders in it. FML
Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML
Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ericwashere 0
The cookie monster is disapointed in you
lindseyluvszac 4
Hurry and extinguish it and say 'That's what you do in case of a small fire.' So that would be the finale to your whole responsibilty speech
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (78)
zowieandzander77 1
why were you baking in a house/apt you don't live in?
Enslaved 38
I think it's the OP that was interviewing the roommates. Now they probably wouldn't want to live with her because she'll possible burn the apt down next time she bakes.(:
zowieandzander77 1
huh... maybe...but saying " I went to interview with potential roommates AT a cooperative living house" definitely sounds like they went somewhere and wasn't interviewing people in their own place.
sougstad 7
Good job slob
cholly 0
Huh?
NickyK 25
Use it to your advantage :)
leadman1989 16
That happens to the best of us, my mon set the oven on fire by leaving oil in there she was actually gonna try to take it out I'm like NOOOO!!!!!! Oven.... fire... resistant... leave... in there! Short story shorter I saved everybody's life I'm awesome :)
rocker_chick105 31
Hey maybe some people like their cookies burned and/or on fire. Positives! Maybe now they'll have to give you one to keep you in order.
zachsky42 2
Wonder what kind of roomate they'll give you 0.o
sky22_fml 7
It's the thought that counts :)
Enslaved 38
Poor cookies, no one will love them. I've burnt too many things in my oven but never caused a fire. (knock on wood) So no more baking for me. Now, the oven is used only as a storage place for my unused pots and pans. Lol
BellaBelle_fml 23
Offer them as burnt offering.