Today, I was on a transatlantic flight, ear plugs in my ears. The steward walked past with a plastic bag. I threw my litter into it and didn't immediately understand why he said, "Very funny, sir." It wasn't a bin bag, he was collecting for Unicef. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I dropped my trash into what I thought was a garbage can. My co-workers stared at me like I had just pissed myself. It was a toy collection box for children in foster care. FML
Today, I was walking through town when I saw a plastic bag on the ground. Trying to be a good citizen, I picked it up, intending on throwing it in the trash. When I looked up, there wasn't a trash can for another hundred feet. So I put it back down. Now I've got a $200 fine to pay for littering. FML
Today, at the beach, I noticed a plastic bag in the water. I wanted to do something good for a change, help protect the environment and get it out. It wasn't a bag; it was a jellyfish. FML
Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML
Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML
Today, I was on a 12-hour transatlantic flight. I asked the flight attendant where the rancid smell was coming from. The guy sitting next to me started laughing, saying, "Sorry, something I ate is not agreeing with me." This was hour one of the flight. FML
Today, I went to drop the garbage in the compactor as I left to do some shopping. I quickly put my handbag down on the side, threw the 'garbage' in the machine, watched it do its thing, and then turned round to find... the bag of garbage on the side. FML
Today, I was sitting in the airport, watching the baggage handlers load the plane I was about to get on. They were being really rough with it, one bag came open and all the clothes spilled out onto the tarmac. The clothes looked familiar. They were mine. FML
Today, I was at my job as a flight attendant. A passenger on my plane stopped breathing and turned blue. As I cleared his airways and was busy strapping an oxygen mask to his face, the passenger behind him tried to hand me her trash. Apparently I'm a walking trash can, no matter what I'm doing. FML
Today, and as always, I recycle my trash at work: paper in the yellow trashcan, the rest in the black one. This morning, I saw a cleaning lady empty the contents of the black trashcan into the yellow one, put the whole lot into a big plastic bag and then leave as if this was normal. FML
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Top comments
arienh4 0
Well, aren't you generous today.
HOPELESSLYxJENN 0
awh. at least it was an honest mistake.
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Comments (33)
arienh4 0
Well, aren't you generous today.
noobgang7 5
who cares, they aren't even non-profit a lot of the money goes to them
TribalSeed 4
donate to specific charities it cover many and you might bit support those... Bo
pinkfrenchrose 5
>.> Ouch
glenzhao2 16
How did you hear him say that if you were listening to music?
heyitslexx 3
It's not like he meant to :/
pommeblossom 0
aw:/
HOPELESSLYxJENN 0
awh. at least it was an honest mistake.
gc_fml 0
:/ i hope you put money in for him.
BlaisOf_Fire91 0
I could see where you would do that. Personally I thought he was giving you a barf bag when I read this xD
duke_nukem_25299 0
ur pic is amazing
dan81892 2
i hope you explained yourself afterwords.
justme6601 0
Unicef can go **** itself, they deserve your trash and nothing more. Unicef leads to kiddy ****.
girandwogpig 0
ok.................
MiaLoves 8
Well that was nice..
mellajella 14
11 - an ellipse is 3 periods not as many as you feel like.
kittykat1501 31
I think 11 means "oooooaaaakkkaaayyyy..."
Amyb_fml 0
Haha like this one, bet you felt like a heel!!
TehGirreth 0
Maybe not a heel; an ankle would make more sense.
Ea12thquake 0
hahahahahah ahsdgkajshd ahahahahhaaaaahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaahaahahahahhhhha