Today, I was in charge of Thanksgiving dinner. I dressed and stuffed the turkey, popped it in the oven and sent a mass text out to my family about how amazing it would be. Everyone arrived, we began making plates of food when I checked the turkey, and realized I never even turned on the oven. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I volunteered to host Christmas dinner for the first time. I forgot to thaw the turkey. We ate sides, wine, and sat in disappointment while the turkey slowly defrosted in the sink. I'm never doing this again. FML
Today, I spent hours cooking an amazing dinner for my family, who had just gotten home from a trip, so we could spend some time together because I'd started to miss everyone. When they got home, they saw it all laid out and just took plates to their room, without even telling me they were home. FML
Today, I took an IQ test and ended up scoring above average. Feeling good about myself, I decided to bake some cookies. After 30 minutes of them not doing anything in the oven, I realized I forgot to turn the oven on. FML
Today, I baked a cake for when my mum came home. I did everything I needed to do and put it in the oven, set the timer and went to do some things around the house. When my mum came home, she asked why there was a uncooked cake mix sitting in the oven. I forgot to turn the oven on. FML
Today, I learned to never put a just-bought-about-an-hour-ago-from-the-grocery-store frozen solid turkey in the turkey frying pot. My job’s banquet hall was burnt to a crisp and the fire department came. The Thanksgiving potluck was ruined. Oh, and I was fired. FML
Today, I was so tired at work that I stared at the microwave waiting for my food. It was a full minute before I realized I'd never actually turned it on after I'd put the food in it. FML
Today, I’m learning to cook and invited friends over to prove I’m improving. I timed everything perfectly… or so I thought. I realized I’d never actually turned the oven on. We stood around a beautifully plated tray of room-temperature lasagna while I said, “It just needs… a bit more time.” Two hours later, we ordered pizza. FML
Today, my self-described "genius" cousin came to the conclusion that cooking the turkey in the oven for 8 hours would take too long, so he doubled the temperature to have it done in half the time. The fire department had to come to put out the fireball that was once my butterball. FML
Today, our freezer was full because my Dad got a free turkey from work. Thing is, my mom bought a pre-made ham, even though she knows my dad brings home a turkey every year. Why? Because of all the prep work that goes into making the turkey, including clearing out the kitchen, and throwing it into the oven. FML
Today, for the very first time, I invited my girlfriend's parents for dinner. I bought a pre-made oven dish, just to be sure nothing could go wrong. Once at the table, her mother asked pointedly who forgot to remove the plastic foil before putting it in the oven. FML
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Top comments
kristinjeaneen 21
You didn't check the turkey or notice you couldn't smell it cooking?
chirstinap325 23
More time to bond with family! Four more hours of it or so..
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Comments (32)
ncparry 18
It takes HOURS to cook a turkey, you didn't check on it even once?
noellebelle626 19
It takes hours to cook a Turkey. Seeing that you didn't check on it better it of never cooked then be black as coal.
LyricaSilvan 30
She posted a follow-up in reply to someone else's comment. I guess she'd asked her husband to check it because she was busy, and he lied about doing so. So it's his fault more than hers.
kitsuneluvuh 12
You should have noticed when you put the turkey in, because you're supposed to preheat the oven first. And then let it cook for a few hours... How long did you have it sitting in the unheated oven before you went to check on it? Also, you shouldn't cook a turkey with stuffing inside it, because if you cook it till the turkey's done, the stuffing inside is still going to be salmonella soup, and if you cook it until the stuffing is safe, the turkey's gonna be overcooked and dry.
ArtistBlock 6
Because it was a 14lb turkey I put it into the oven before preheating it so I could slide it onto the racks without burning myself, since I'm also a bit of a klutz. By "stuffed" I mean an herb bundle along with a tin of stock to keep it juicy on the inside. I'd been asking my husband to check on it for me since I still had a lot of other dishes to make and prepare and he told me it had been going fine. Turns out he's a bit lazy and a good liar.
Talented73 54
Okay. FYL because your well-intentioned family meal got loused up; YDI for NOT checking your oven.
sietseld 13
No one actually likes the turkey anyway. You're fine!
Dane2dawg 12
Wow, that's a pretty bad mess up, well at least I bet you got to talk to the family or go out to eat on Thanksgiving OP!
dguzman92 12
how did you not smell it cooking? or check to add more flavor?
BalisongAngel 0
I expected it to be burned to hell and back.
marthamydear23 9
you never checked? you didn't notice you couldn't smell it cooking? ate you not too bright?
sallygee 9
so you never checked once you put it in the oven? no basting? you didnt think it odd that you didn't smell it cooking? ydi