Today, I pulled over to help a girl with her car. I thought my limited mechanic skills would help look like a hero. She only needed her coolant cap unscrewed. With top down, shirt off, I was confident as I got out of my car. 10 minutes later I left because I couldn't unscrew the f***ing thing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, on my way to work, I noticed a woman on the side of the road waving for help, her car appearing to be broken down. I pulled over, stepped out of my car, went over to her car, lifted the hood, and checked it. When I looked up to tell her what was wrong, she and my car were gone. FML
Today, I was working as a service writer in an auto service shop. A really cute girl came in to buy a headlight, I offered to install the bulb for her. My hand got stuck behind the headlight, she had to ask one of our mechanics to come remove the air box from her car to get my hand out. FML
Today, I helped an elderly lady unscrew the cooling tank's cap from her smoking car. My reward? A scalding shower of toxic, pungent antifreeze that erupted moments after removing said cap. She didn't even thank me. FML
Today, my car broke down. My boyfriend, who is not too handy, insisted on fixing it. He called me outside and said he was done and started the engine. Moments after rejoicing, it burst into flames. FML
Today, I pulled over to help an attractive girl on the highway in the middle of nowhere. When I asked if she needed help she told me she was going to try starting her car one more time. She then started to make fake engine noises and told me that she was good to go and that I should be on my way. FML
Today, I thought I'd be a suave gentleman by opening the car door for my date. The handle came off in my hand, and I had to spend the next 15 minutes pretending I was doing an impromptu repair on my piece of shit car, when I had no idea what I was doing. FML
Today, I locked myself out of my car while the engine was running. I called roadside assistance, waited 40 minutes, then watched a stranger walk past, point at the unlocked passenger door, and open it for me. FML
Today, I couldn't get my car hood to open to check the fluids. A few miles down the highway, though, it popped right open. FML
Today, I thought my car was overheating. I then thought it was wise to put my hand close to my muffler to feel the heat. Needless to say, I stuck my entire hand on my muffler then had to drive around with the only cold thing in my car. A cold beer from my cooler. Yes, I got pulled over. FML
Today, a guy's car broke down in my street, so I helped him push it into my driveway, checked his car out, and gave it a jump start. He thanked me, then as he went to pull out, he instead smashed straight into my car. FML
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Top comments
blazin_b 0
Push down and turn.
eighthchord 0
You took your shirt off to help a girl with her car? Or was it already off? Why? Oh you were riding in your convertible. Still....why?
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Comments (116)
noName123456 0
#8 is the ******* man
Theos_fml 0
Good Plan #32 #66-you do not beat something with a wrench to get it to loosen up. That could break it and that would be a bad thing! #73-maybe that was someone else. Only one girl was mentioned, and people have car problems all the time. How can we know you were the girl? There's no proof. (sorry if I sound a little rude) Coolant caps are tight because coolant absorbs heat and increases in pressure. Just a small increase in pressure makes it a lot harder seeing as the cap doesn't have much space to move and reduce pressure* It was never mentioned whose shirt was off* Good mechanics use logic and know a bit about physics (even if they never did good in school)* It should come off when you turn it counter-clockwise* You must increase the pressure on the outside to make it equal to the pressure inside to facilitate the unscrewing of the cap-lean on it fatty* #8 made a good pun*
babawaba 0
@#63: Ya he obviously had good intentions. Enjoy being treated like an object by tools.
TheSmirkster 0
Yeah, if the car was hot and had fluid, you could have gotten your shirtless chest covered in burn, then you'd be a complete douche.
lunchmeat317 0
I was going to comment but #80 beat me to it. Well said.
the2belo 0
Yeah, you really unscrewed the pooch with that one, buddy.
xroflmaoxd 0
So what if you're a hero. It's not like because if that you're suddenly going to sleep with her. Unless you're being nice, you still fail.
kimjoypop 0
what a hero hahahaha
mdh6173 0
Good thing your cockiness didn't prevail...if you removed the radiator cap before it cooled you would have burned your skin off from the steam it released!
SirAndrew 0
You have to wait for the radiator to cool first and relieve pressure, right?