Today, I made a point of talking to our parachute riggers, and thanking them for all they do. Today is also the first day I had to pull my reserve chute because my main chute didn't open correctly. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Safety last
Today, my foreman complained that I was slowing down productivity and costing the company money, all because I was wearing a harness to protect me from falling over the edge of a three story building. FML
Today, it was my first day being a full-time paramedic. I was shot in the arm. FML
Duly noted
Today, my boss watched me get my waistband hooked on a safety hazard in the warehouse. She included it in the safety report. FML
Today, while running an event, my belt loop got caught in those metal whorls that outdoor chairs have. I couldn't get it undone and had to greet guests by standing up and bringing the chair with me, hanging from my ass. My coworker finally had to cut the belt loop to set me free. FML
Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after we jumped, and only came to as we touched the ground. FML
Ripper
Today, at work, the seat of my pants ripped open. A coworker lent me a pair of his back-up jeans, and then those ripped in the crotch. FML
Not cut out for this
Today, I took my girlfriend skydiving for her birthday. I insisted on joining her to make it a memory for us both, despite my fear of heights. I passed out twice mid-freefall and had to be saved by the instructor both times. FML
Wahey!
Today, I went parasailing for the first time ever. My friends thought it would be funny to pull down my trunks right before my feet left the boat. I dangled there in the air for the whole resort to see. On top of that, I lost my shorts in the ocean. FML
Today, I managed to stop my supervisor from falling into a trench, only for the ground to give way and for me to fall in instead. My supervisor didn't even notice. FML
Hi-Di-Hi!
Today, I was preparing to leave my campsite when I noticed that my neighbors were trying to put up a canopy. I walked over and said, "Do you need a hand?" Then I noticed the man had a prosthetic hook. FML
Top comments
Lady_Spaghetti 36
It was just their idea of a joke-- "Hey, let's mispackage his main chute so that he freaks out." "Haha that's great."
aruden 25
A mistake that shouldn't happen, chutes that fail can seriously hurt or kill the poor bastard who got stuck with it.
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Comments (30)
TheNewGuy03 29
Airborne!
thefmlman2011 37
Medal of Honor: airbourne
TheNewGuy03 29
I'm actually gonna go ahead and guess that OP is a member of 82nd ABN at Ft. Bragg (based on his location).
FML_HelloItsMe 15
Hard Luck OP! Hope you are alright! You can bet it was just a mistake!
aruden 25
A mistake that shouldn't happen, chutes that fail can seriously hurt or kill the poor bastard who got stuck with it.
KorGarott 4
which is why reserve chutes exist
izzajaneful 24
Are there mistakes that should happen?
JZY1989 23
Chute that was a close one. My sad attempt at a pun, yes I failed.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
At least you didn't thank them twice!
Lady_Spaghetti 36
It was just their idea of a joke-- "Hey, let's mispackage his main chute so that he freaks out." "Haha that's great."
Dave_Davington 34
Am I the only one who first read "riggers" as something completely different?
Lalala579121 28
Yes.
skullmaster9 10
Nope
OhPuhleeze 23
I think you should be talking to, and thanking Dog more often. Perhaps checking the rig yourself woudn't be bad either. But that must've been some adrenaline rush!!!
eblondie2838 9
Being a parachute rigger myself, I would say "bad body position." ;)
DrEnia1at0r 20
Ha. That'll teach you to be thankful.
holly_fly 34
I thought it was pretty good. XD