Today, I had an appraisal meeting with The Boss. She raved and gushed and told me what a great job I was doing. Then she said, "Well done, Eric!" Eric isn't my name. She froze, opened a new file, and told me my actual appraisal, which was the complete opposite of everything she had just said. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, the CEO of my company wanted to meet with me. I was excited until I found out she just wanted to bitch me out and personally fire me. Later on, I found out my boss had totally shafted me and blamed the failure of a big project on me instead of admitting it was all his fault. FML
Nice meeting you
Today, my boss finally pronounced my name correctly. My name was then followed by the words, "You're fired." FML
Goofs and gaffes
Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML
Great replacement
Today, my boss dropped a highly important and dense report on my desk that had to be finished by the end of the day. After the initial panic attack and hours of scrupulous work, I finished. She then asked me to pick up the revised copy, where my name was replaced with hers. FML
Today, I had my performance review at work. Under the "oral communication" category my boss wrote that I "act like an asshole." FML
There's no I in team, apparently
Today, a positively glowing online review was left by a client about me recently - listing my first and last name mind you - and my boss wrote back, thanking them for the kind words, then carried on about how awesome my coworker is. FML
Storage wars
Today, I brought my daughter to work with me. When we walked in, a client was blowing up at my boss, all because as my boss was walking past his storage unit, he glanced in and was about to compliment how neat it was. After my boss left, I had to deal with the aftermath, which left my daughter terrified of this man. FML
Bosses gonna boss
Today, my supervisor’s first words when looking at my work were, “What is this shit?!” I explained that I'd done it exactly like she told me to. She just kept on grumbling because she couldn’t find a single thing I had done wrong, which apparently ruined her day. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML
Before I forget…
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. My boss called me into her office and congratulated me, and spent almost half an hour asking me what our wedding plans were, where we might honeymoon, if we wanted kids, etc. She then followed this by suddenly remembering she had called me into the office to sack me. FML
Top comments
Jimboom 12
Lol. Well not really a FML as appraisals are generally fair, unless you have done something to piss off the bosses. My suggestion would be to be more like Eric and work hard. Then you might get the recognition you feel you deserve.
Nadramia 0
well eric isnt doing THAT great of a job is she didnt even know how he looks like.....
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Comments (46)
Ktulu 0
That's just sad...
MaiLouIsLegend 0
So what? You suck @ work. Maybe you should do better next time obviously if you wanna be praised for real next time.
TryToBeKind 0
Aw shit, that really sucks! Managers are human beings and human beings are not perfect. I think ethically, all she could do was say, "I made a boo boo and thought you were someone else." I hope you did not get fired and that you have a chance to redeem yourself in work. I hope you are able to say, "Everyone makes mistakes, as you just did - please give me another chance and help me along the way." Even if you have to take a bit of a cut in pay - anything - to keep your job in this economy. I wouldn't say you deseerved that at all, it was awful for all around. Hrm - I think that when in doubt, it's best to conform. That seriously sux, as Im' a happy non-conformist.
xkaokaox 0
well if you are shit at your job and she is praising you, shouldn't you know better?
cheesepuff18 0
I haven't said this in a while, and it's a little outdated, but BURN!
Wileypube 0
Must be a government job. FYL.
ramdoodle45 0
that means you should get your crap together and actually do a good job rather than be pissed off when someone accidentally mistakes you for someone who's doing a good job.
tehhotness 0
wait, Bruce Springstein is a dude, whyd you keep saying "she"?
Ridley_fml 0
well you sound like a shitty employee shut up #19 you're probably the original poster. Your boss is your boss because she's better and more important than you. She wouldn't say you suck as an employee when she's doing a bad job. You need to grow up and stop blaming other people.
kfnnnp 0
Maybe watch what Eric does and learn from him?