Today, I got a 31% on a Chinese test at school. I moved here to New Jersey from China two months ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had a Chinese test. Our teacher decided to wait until yesterday to tell us about it because she "knew" we wouldn't study anyway and she didn't want to stress us out. I'm pretty sure I failed. FML
Today, the parent of a student called to ask me about a homework assignment. At the end of the call, she told me that I seem to be losing my "Asian accent" from when she first talked to me in the summer. I was born in the US, grew up in NJ and speak perfect English. FML
Today, I was asked to prove that I was Chinese by translating the phrase, "Ching chong ming chang ho". I'm not even Chinese. FML
Timewaster
Today, after spending months learning Chinese, selling my house and everything I own for my big transfer to Hong Kong, my boss decided I should instead go to our other branch across town. FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, in algebra, I took out my notebook. My Chinese teacher was so impressed with my "Chinese" writings on the cover that I'm now her "favorite student". Those "Chinese" symbols are actually Japanese, but I wanted someone to like me so badly that I didn't correct her. FML
My words exactly
Today, the Chinese student I've been teaching English to got on stage in front of hundreds of people to read her final essay. She ended with, "What a fucking day." I don't swear, and I no longer have a job. FML
Going well is it?
Today, I analysed my first mock test for an exam I have to take in 5 months. I got 31/150. FML
Today, I found out that I was one point away from passing a state science exam. FML
Today, I went to see the school counselor to schedule my classes for school. She asked me if I knew how to speak English. My parents are Chinese and I don't even know how to speak Chinese. I've lived in America my whole life. Plus, I even spoke to her in English to ask about classes. FML
Top comments
Madel_fml 0
Were you born in China? I mean, if you lived there for like a year, then that would make sense. Chinese is hard. If you were born there, well I don't know...
jackaaa 0
That actually happens often. I've had friends move to Mexico during high school, and they always did poorly on their English tests. It's because they go into more detail in the class than we ever did here. They concentrate on the little things we don't notice. It's normal.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (148)
That_Guy 4
@54 wtf? what you said: "Most "Chinese" language classes are actually "Mandarin." The OP could be a native Wu, Min, or Cantonese speaker - all of which are Chinese." what i said: "yes its more specific than just chinese, there are different elements to it but its all generalized as Chinese" you said the same thing i did, you just got more technical than i cared to do on this blog, and when i was in high school, the class was called Chinese, not Mandarin, or Cantonese ect. so yes Chinese isn't a specific language but generalized, like i said, yes it is a language. and yes i know Canadians don't speak Canadian, ******* asshole i used to live in Canada!
mrdouchebag 0
Everyone needs to stop this Jersey bashing. I love it here.
vitamin_f 0
Cantonese is a dialect. We learn Mandarin here (I'm of Chinese ethnicity but not in China), but everyone calls is Chinese. We are forbidden to speak dialects in school (Cantonese, Hokkien etc), but I hate the sound of most dialects anyway.
That_Guy 4
hahaha, thank you #57
ionelementz112 0
@55 By elements, I didn't think you meant vastly different dialects that are together "all generalized as Chinese." I guess English and French can be all generalized as Canadian.
That_Guy 4
dude! what the ****! haha would you also guess that Nahuatl, Yucatec Maya, Mixtec, Zapotec, Otomí, Huastec, Chinantec, Tarascan, Guarijío. Pima Bajo, Kikapú, ect. are all generalized as mexican? NO you ******* prick, you wouldn't because mexican isn't a ******* language! neither is Canadian, its a type of people! so how about you just shut your ignorant ass up! because your not using a valid point. i see what your saying, chinese is a type of people not a language, but when you take the ******* class the class is called Chinese 101 you mother ****** so stop trying to act like your the most worldly man in the world, your not, your a dumbass!
youareindeepshit 0
What's with ignorant Americans these days? When you say Chinese, it's implied that it is "Mandarin". However, TECHNICALLY, there are many different forms and dialects. What distinguishes the dialects are mostly pronunciation and use of slang language. Chinese can be written in simplified or traditional. Some people think Mandarin is simplified and Cantonese is traditional. This is wrong. Simplified is simply a new way of writing the characters which is now adopted by most of China. HongKong and Taiwan are the only regions that officially still use Traditional characters, but it is only because Taiwan refuses to belong to a part of China, and HongKong has been legal territory of England until 1996. and yes, I have no life for writing this essay on a FML. :D
TheOrpheus 0
thats only f***ed up because you had to move to Jersey
That_Guy 4
lmfao i love FML :)
Pheonee 0
They don't care if you're right, they care more about if you remembered all THEIR lessons correctly. Pretend you're an idiot to Chinese like the rest of the class and you'll pass with flying colours.