Today, I found out that some men think it's OK to clip their fingernails at the table, in a restaurant, on a first date. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down at the restaurant, he immediately snatched my menu and said "You're having salad." FML
Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I really like. Midway through dinner, I felt something stuck in my teeth and, trying to be discreet, attempted to remove it. In the process, I flicked a piece of food across the table and it landed in his drink. He looked at it, then at me, then sighed. FML
Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML
Today, I went to dinner to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I received a text message, so I pulled out my phone to check. Apparently, his parents have a "No phones at the table rule" and took my phone away until I could learn "proper table manners." FML
Today, I was on a first date and tried to playfully flick a fry at him. It missed, hit a waiter in the face, and he dropped an entire tray of drinks onto an elderly couple. My date laughed, then excused himself to the bathroom… and never came back. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who insisted on eating off my plate the whole night. He didn't order his own food, because according to him, "it’s more intimate to share." He didn’t get why I found the whole deal off-putting. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant for a second date. As we were eating, a piece of food got stuck in my teeth. I tried to discreetly remove it, but ended up spitting it across the table and onto my date's glasses. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
At least he wasn't using a Pedegg on his feet and dumping the shavings into the food.
VirtuallyUnbreak 0
Wow men go to such lengths to show disinterest.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (60)
allmidnighteyes 11
At least he wasn't using a Pedegg on his feet and dumping the shavings into the food.
myfriend_youfail 3
Bahahahaha my boyfriend actually threatened to replace our grated Parmesan cheese with Ped-Egg shavings after I pulled a prank on him. Mmmm. Feet. Tasty?
polico_wolf 0
on the advert they dump the shavings into a saucepan
polico_wolf 0
they throw the shavings into a saucepan in the advert
b182link 0
maybe she was on disaster date
BigRedDilDoTIME 1
#1 YDI for online dating
arbw090583 10
Yeah, that's gross.
VirtuallyUnbreak 0
Wow men go to such lengths to show disinterest.
youthink_fml 0
No, not some men - this man. And what do you expect in redneck South Carolina?
The_Pleb 0
Yeah lol what do you actually expect of a man living in America???? Nothing haha
Veritas143 0
For every insult I see about an American Guy..I shall kill you.
captain_soggy 0
yeah, you're right, we're all just socially handicapped buffoons here.
futurex 0
Goood One
sweetjeebus 0
LOL #3! That is just gross! I dated a guy that smelled them after he was done. We didn't date long after that!
Jewelofagal 2
You didn't date long?! You actually dated him some after that?
Zazu7711 0
LOOL
rufio1 0
take consolation that they didnt cut their toenails
jess6blondie9 3
True.
darryaz 9
I'm guessing there won't be a 2nd date?
perdix 31
Did he want you to complete the mani-pedi? On the second date, he plans to trim his nose hairs. I'd try to make that a date that doesn't involve food.
fragmite 1
I'm guessing he was trying to gross you out so there wouldn't be a second date.
Erindub 0
You should've started picking your nose abd eating it