catfan
Wildomar, United States
Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML
catfan tells us more.
Hi this is OP. First off, my daughter is not pregnant. She has been going to school sex ed classes since she was 11, apparently they don't explain how someone gets pregnant in enough detail. She told me she's a virgin, though she thought she wasn't because she was "having sex" with the showerhead. Apparently one of her friends had told her masturbation counts as sex.
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Top comments
thatgirlkat 9
That tells you what she's doing in the shower.
wolfstalker213 14
Time to explain the birds and bees...?
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Comments (279)
Vegeto30294 19
Wait, do you mean she is actually pregnant and the showerhead caused it, or using the showerhead will eventually get her pregnant?
djbruceybruce 19
Neither she thought she was pregnant from the shower
lokland 12
Thank you, Captain obvious *salutes*
str1kepa1n 16
I'm confused, is she actually pregnant? Or she thinks she is?
DLT_fml 20
It says that she thinks it "got her pregnant." I think it's safe to assume from the wording that she is indeed.
Zomg_Okay 27
44 - No, it isn't safe to assume that. The sentence can be interpretted two ways: She's pregnant and thinks the showerhead did it. She isn't pregnant but thinks she is from the showerhead.
monnanon 14
if she really had had sex do you think she would be dumb enough to blame the shower for an actual pregnancy? im guessing she had irregular periods coupled with masturbation guilt and believes she is pregnant.
littlekellilee 45
She could have gotten pregnant and the guy told her it was the showerhead. People believe some crazy things.
monnanon 14
i highly doubt it. someone who has actually had sex is not going to make up that kind of story. shes thirteen not stupid.
ImAFaker 29
No she seems pretty stupid to me.
Aleys_fml 21
Yeah she's 13 AND stupid
rgriff27 19
13 and stupid leads to 16 and pregnant.
monnanon 14
@147 there is a difference a very thin one granted, betwrrn naievety and stupidity. i think she is just naieve.
alxpilk 8
Dang it... -_-
therouni 23
I wonder what that baby will look like...
Futacy 30
Showerhead human = autobot. it maakes sense
therouni 23
Aah, I like the way you think!
YepThatsMeee 23
I think she will give birth to a baby shower
kyu_Q 19
the baby would look like the watery alien from the abyss
BlackPanther19 11
Time for the talk
uhohjoe 5
a) YDI for not having educated your teenage daughter about reproduction. honestly. b) if she actually was pregnant surely she would attribute it to sex and not an inanimate object?! unless you're a complete idiot, in which case YDI again.
RedPillSucks 33
Maybe it's the kid that's the idiot and not OP. Honestly, no matter how much you teach, some kids don't want to learn.
uhohjoe 5
On the contrary, I think it makes perfect sense to teach children about their physiology before they hit puberty. At the very least I think we can agree that you should warn your daughter about periods so it doesn't freak her the **** out when she starts bleeding from her hoo-ha one day, and from menstruation it's not exactly a giant leap to reproduction... Besides, we're not talking about toddlers here. A pre-pubsecent girl is absolutely mentally and emotionally capable of understanding how puberty works.
darwinism 30
Just explain to her that she can't get pregnant from head.
Eleanor6141 11
while I agree with you, judging from the text "thinks the shower head got her pregnant" usually implies that she may already be pregnant..
monnanon 14
i could mean that she is pregnant but it could also mean she us not pregnant but is irregular with her cycle.
romanhoe 6
keep an eye on her xD. or she'll do nasty stuff with the shower head,.
speechprincess 15
I think it's a little late for that!
Lydiaanninos 5
Um. You're kidding right? I think maybe you should have given her "the talk" when she got her period or even before.
skitzymew 19
She probably doesn't have her period yet. Most parents wait until then to give the talk.
doodlecloud 27
Why would you wait until they come home totally freaked out over the blood and stuff to explain that actually, you you knew this was going to happen all along, you just thought it would be a nice surprise for them? That's just mean. Plus periods are one of the later stages of puberty. If they're having periods they've likely already gone through growth spurts, weight gain, hair growth, boobs, etc. that they already need explaining...and if you're explaining those you kind of need to explain what puberty is as a whole, periods included.
DanielleinDC 34
My mom gave me the talk--she actually had me grab the encyclopedia (yes, I'm that old)--long before I got my period. I also had age-appropriate books to read about where babies come from and puberty. So when I got my period, I knew exactly what it was. If OP is uncomfortable giving the talk, she can find age-appropriate books to give her daughter and offer to answer questions. I wouldn't be surprised if OP's daughter is in a school district with abstinence-only "education"
greeneyebeauty9 28
I don't know if I should find this A) disturbing or B) hilarious. I'll just go with A and B.
RedPillSucks 33
hilariously disturbing, or disturbingly hilarious?