Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally put the finishing touches to a huge project after 8 months of gruelling work. My boss had used the promise of a 5-figure bonus to motivate me. When I casually brought the bonus up later in the day, my boss just said, "Gratitude's its own reward, Mike." FML
Today, my boss made me work a longer shift than usual. Not because he needed me in, but just so I'd finish at the same time as his brat of a son, and give him a lift home. FML
Today, my company was having a huge party so I went to work dressed in my best outfit. During lunch break, my boss said to me, "You really missed out on something yesterday, it was great fun!" FML
Today, my boss entrusted me with his car to run an errand, as I usually take the bus. I managed to get there and back safely before someone slammed into me while I was re-entering the lot, causing major damage. It was his wife, who thought I was a car thief. FML
Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML
Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML
Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. Turns out they are firing 35 people. I wasn't on the list until I asked for a raise. FML
Today, my boss sent me a message about a project, via WhatsApp. It's my day off, so I figured it could wait till I was able to give a flying fuck. Literally a minute later, he was spamming me, demanding to know why I'd left him as read and reminding me that he has firing powers. FML
Today, while battling a severe flu, I was forced to come to work by my manager. Upon arrival, I discovered that a colleague he likes who should be covering for me is out today. The reason? Her shoes hurt. FML
Today, I wasn't allowed to work from home, despite being ill enough to just take the day off anyway, all so there could be "someone to answer the phone." The phone didn't ring once all day. FML
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Top comments
jessherself13 21
Bahhumbug, what a Scrooge. Seriously though, you have a heartless boss.
DocBastard 40
I would think after a memo like that you'd think to take precautions to avoid this exact scenario. That said, your boss is an asshole.
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Comments (83)
mwali02 32
How big was your bonus supposed to be?
stevoh101 2
your boss pretty much sucks.....sorry bro
perdix 31
Set all your coworkers clocks and watches and cellphones a few minutes slow, and set your office clocks a little fast. That way, everyone will be screwed out of their bonus and you'll all revolt against your boss's edict.
Xombie86 9
That sucks bloody ******.
tehdarkness 21
Commuting to work is then worst!
Lili_love 14
Lesson learned I hope! You should always give yourself at least 10 extra minutes to get to your destination and probably a good half hour during the holiday season depending on where you work
love_me_electric 20
All you people saying 'just leave 10 minutes early' have obviously never tried to drive in rush hour traffic. Especially in the winter, when there can be poor driving conditions and possibly accidents blocking entire lanes of traffic. A 25-30 minute drive can take almost 2 hours if there's been a blizzard and roads haven't been cleared yet. OP probably DID leave early, but road conditions/traffic were worse than he anticipated.
alycion 39
But we all have cell phones. If traffic isn't moving, call. Even if it's only going to be five minutes late. Then companies know you are taking your job seriously and may he less likely to follow through on threats. I've been late once or twice. I call if I even think there is a possibility I will be late at all.
Steffi 26
It's illegal to use a mobile phone while driving in the U.K., and it's not uncommon for other drivers to report you if you use one while driving in the U.K. :L.
Zebediabolical 45
What about hands-free phones. Aren't they legal to use while driving in the UK?
love_me_electric 20
Traffic doesn't usually stay stopped long enough to make a phone call. Usually you will drive like 10 feet, then there's be a short pause, then you'll drive another 10 feet. If you stayed stopped long enough to make a phone call I guarantee the cars behind you would be blaring their horns before the person you're calling even picks up. And you shouldn't be making the call while moving for obvious reasons.
DidntGetTheMemo 5
That sucks for the OP, but why are some people acting like the boss is a jerk? Part of his job is to make sure that his employees are on time.
annihil8or 15
No shit!
BMTHsuperfan 18
you had a boner for your holiday bonus?