To-Do List Blues By FML Approved - 09/10/2017 03:00 So much to do, so little desire... I agree, your life sucks 444 You deserved it 112 Share Tweet Share
Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 005 You deserved it 313 067
Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML I agree, your life sucks 208 You deserved it 1 190
Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML I agree, your life sucks 30 845 You deserved it 6 771
Today, my hatred for IKEA reignited when I rammed my knee into my hotel bathroom's plexiglass counter top while I was drying myself off. Their interior designer must have have been suffering brain damage when she matched everything with the floor tiles. FML I agree, your life sucks 18 759 You deserved it 6 526
Today, I was hushed in a theatre during a play. I would normally appreciate a discreet silencing in the audience, but I was saying my lines. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 913 You deserved it 262
Today, I am 10 weeks pregnant and my husband says he needs time for himself. This apparently means he will be romancing and sleeping with other women so he can "relax". FML I agree, your life sucks 3 602 You deserved it 276
Today, I got back from my honeymoon. Return flights from Australia to New Zealand? $1,800. A week’s accomodation in another country? $1,500. Busting my new husband finger banging a barmaid by the public pool? Fucking priceless. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 135 You deserved it 206
Today, it's been a year since my partner and I opened our business. To keep it running, I've had to work 2 jobs just to make ends meet, as well as run the business. My partner has focused on the business. He just got a job offer that would mean we close and move, and I would only need to work part-time. He refused. FML I agree, your life sucks 907 You deserved it 149