Today, at a family reunion, my grandpa loudly said that I look like "a cheap Vegas whore" because of my heavy purple eye-shadow. I could tell that a few other people agreed. I was too embarrassed to explain that the "eye-shadow" was just dark circles from fatigue. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my grandpa pointed me out to one of his friends, saying, "Yeah, she's the ugly one." FML
Today, my six-year-old son told me my makeup looks like his grandmother's did in the casket. FML
Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that, "Old people are allowed to tell the truth." FML
Today, poorly applied makeup made it look like I have a black eye in most of my wedding photos. I would have laughed it off, but I was showing them to my brother who was deployed during the actual wedding. He saw the black eye, assumed it was domestic abuse, and attacked my husband. FML
Today, I told a coworker, “You look way better without makeup.” She responded, “I’m wearing makeup.” Everyone around us gasped like I had just said "fuck" in church. FML
Today, we had a group of friends over, as well as my grandma. She started talking about me when I was a kid, when I suddenly heard her saying, "Well, yeah, she wasn’t a beautiful child, not at all, she looked.… OK." FML
Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML
Today, all of my friends and teachers asked me what was wrong because I looked sad and tired. One kid even said that I looked like "an abused housewife the day after." I was fine. It was the first time I went to school without wearing any makeup. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML
Today, as I walked around town I noticed some guys and even a couple of girls checked me out. When I got home later I realized they probably weren't checking me out, so much as wondering why the hell I had thick black eyeliner on only one eye. Oops. FML
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Top comments
WinterChild 20
Should have said "Oh I'm sorry, does it remind you of that story I wasn't suppose to tell grandma about?"
A07 48
You should've said "Ofcourse you'd know all about them" when he said that
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Comments (58)
ColonelCusswords 24
Look on the bright side, your dark eye circles make you look like "a cheap Vegas *****" not a cheap vegas drag queen like mine do
WhoopteDo 26
It also wasn't a black eye. That's another bright side.
ColonelCusswords 24
get off my comment fluffy
jadenjacksonm 14
Discontinue this.
Feklfekl2222 32
This is a ******* train wreck
ColonelCusswords 24
Thanks guys I love you all
DemHaxBro 20
Try to get more sleep op
shessohighh 10
It's probably not due to sleep. That kind is easy to conceal. As someone who has always suffered from dark circles due to genetics and sinus issues, I can attest that they are impossible to mask. I feel for you OP. I've been there.
WinterChild 20
Should have said "Oh I'm sorry, does it remind you of that story I wasn't suppose to tell grandma about?"
HollyQuinn 21
Hey, maybe a new career path for ya? Kidding, what a weenie.
MagnusDeus 24
Did you get punched in the face? How dark can those circles be??
militarybrat 21
Depending on what type, the allergic shiners and genetic type can get quite dark. Mine get almost black daily.
A07 48
You should've said "Ofcourse you'd know all about them" when he said that
lexiieeex3 32
Regardless of your age you never disrespect grandpa...
Abhimanyu 14
#48 I understand what you're saying but, sometimes you must stand up and speak for yourself. Blood relations don't give someone a right to insult their family members no matter how young or old they're.
CharlieM78 9
Why would you be embarrassed? Just call him on it by saying thanks but it's not makeup you dick I simply have not been getting enough rest because (fill in the blank) and make him look like the asshat he is.
teentee401 37
Yeah I'd be more embarrassed by people thinking I look like a cheap ***** than by having them know that I haven't gotten much sleep.
cheeeksss 29
I'm with 25. Isn't it less embarrassing to have dark circles? And by the way, what the **** kind of grandfather does OP have...
Lalala579121 28
By the sounds of it, one of the ones who always blames everything on the commies.
Kieranr10 23
Now u can make some extra money
dayi_beny 11
don't worry, I used to be a bastard in my grandpa's eyes too, but he passed away :|
tranced_ 45
typical family reunion in a nutshell. .