Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend and I decided to be a bit naughty on Skype. It was 3am so we assumed that my dad was asleep and did some dirty talk. When we were done, I heard my dad laughing outside my room; he'd heard it all. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML
Today, my dad came home from work early only to walk in on me and the boy I'm not supposed to be seeing having sex. Did I mention doggie style? FML
Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said, "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw." It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parents' house and forgot his phone. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
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Top comments
emery52 0
i never understood phone sex
icehot 0
when you start pushing the pound key over and over
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Comments (113)
SerbianGirl_fml 0
YDI, sorry.
onionboy 0
He should have had the "phone sex talk" and said,"That shit is dumb, don't ever call my house again pussy! Either bang her or don't, but don't talk-**** my phone."
dabeachbum 0
hahahahahaahahahhahahaahah. wooooow.. lolol at least ur bf actually came over! that like proves that hes committed thats the good part the rest sucks....but its funny. haha =]
HyperExecuter 0
loser
zachbingham 0
You deserved it. Seriously, phone sex? just go over there. then if you would have gotten caught they at least wouldn't thing your weird.
Monkey_Man_03 0
honestly? phone sex. that's pathetic. just do it.
pinkypig312 0
At least this is better than having the real intercourse. Your dad probably shouldn't have done that. >.>
sarasweetie 0
thats the exact same thing my dad would do.... little tip... if you have phone sex either do it over text or if you wanna actually talk on the phone, make sure NO ONE IS AROUND. or do it when your home alone & if your not... dont do it.
LIFESKCUS 0
Don't have phone sex or you'll get hearing aids
smlz4me 1
STALKER FATHER!! <80