Today, I only open my curtains in the morning so my plants won’t die. Me, I leave in the dark and return in the dark. The only time I see the sun in winter is during lunch breaks and weekends. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got home and noticed my kitchen light was on. I was annoyed because I'd definitely switched it off that morning. Then I noticed that I'd left the curtains open. The sun was shining directly through the window onto the wall. I'd spent five minutes investigating sunlight. FML
Today I discovered that I'm so pale that I can lighten up any distant dark corner of the room just by placing my hand by a window and reflecting the light like a mirror. Imagine how bright it would be if I stood by the window naked. FML
Today, I went to open my bedroom curtains while still in my pajamas, which, in my defense, were just a very oversized T-shirt. I didn’t realize the window cleaners were outside until I heard one of them say, “Morning!” We made prolonged eye contact before I slowly closed the curtains like I was lowering the lid on my own coffin. FML
Today, my country announced that there will be 10 hours of power cuts starting from tomorrow. This basically means that if I want to begin my day at 8:00 am, it will only really get started at 6:00 pm, once the sun is down and the birds are done chirping. FML
Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML
Today, it’s the fourth day in a row I’ve laid in bed for hours with my eyes shut, wide awake, then watched the sun rise. All my parents have to say is, “Insomnia isn’t real. Just go to bed earlier.” FML
Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML
Today, I left work at 11pm. It was cold and dark, and I was anxious to get home, so I cut across some soccer fields to get to my car. About halfway across, the sprinklers came on. FML
Today, it was sunny and bright so I woke up feeling great. I pulled back the curtains in my room and saw my cat dead on the lawn. FML
Today, after spending the evening with friends, I went home and realized that the living room light was on. Thinking someone was robbing me, I hid behind a bush. I got impatient and crept up to the door. Then I remembered that I'd left the light on before I left. FML
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Top comments
warmonger711 8
Same issue with life as an enlisted sailor, show at work when it’s dark, leave when it’s dark. Mind you this location is in PNW. **** military life.
RichardPencil 32
Work harder so you can get an office with a window. On nice sunny days, you'll be filled with regret and resentment that you can't be outside.
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Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
Work harder so you can get an office with a window. On nice sunny days, you'll be filled with regret and resentment that you can't be outside.
spinningrecords 14
You should take a lesson from your plants.
warmonger711 8
Same issue with life as an enlisted sailor, show at work when it’s dark, leave when it’s dark. Mind you this location is in PNW. **** military life.
Marcella1016 32
Fake your death and take one of your plants’ place. Clearly, this is the only way.
Yudith 28
Buy some of those sun lamps, you know, the lamps that imitate real sun light to improve your mood in winter. Put one or two in your office, three around your plants, and one over your kitchen sink. You'll feel so much better, and your plants too!