Today, and everyday, I'm so dumb that if there is no sign, I can’t tell if a door is pull or push. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at a local mini mart, I tried several times to open a door that clearly said "PUSH" by pulling it, much to the amusement to the customers and staff inside. FML
Today, I walked up to what appeared to be an automatic door. I stood for a second, waved my arms, but nothing happened. Then a guy came from behind me, pushed a clearly visible button under a clearly visible sign that read "Push to open." He said, “It’s OK, happens to everyone.” It doesn’t feel like it does. FML
Today, I walked into a "pull" door after confidently telling someone, "It's this way, I know this place like the back of my hand." The sound of my forehead hitting the glass kinda proved otherwise. FML
Today, at Walmart, I unknowingly chose the only non-automatic door to exit through. I stood in front of the door looking for the motion sensor while the greeters laughed at me for at least half a minute before I saw the "PUSH" sticker. FML
Today, I walked up to a store’s automatic doors. They didn’t open. I waved my arms, stepped back and forward again, nothing. A staff member came over, tapped a button, and said, “It’s manual.” FML
Today, I went to the bathroom. I locked the stall door, but got walked in on anyway. This is the eighth time this has happened this week, and multiple people think I’m just too stupid to lock the door. FML
Today, my laziness hit a new low when I tried closing my bedroom door using my mind. FML
Today, the employee entrance to my workplace was moved. Not only will no one tell me where it is, they all insist it wasn’t moved. There’s literally a sign on the door that says the entrance has been moved. FML
Today, I tried to unlock my front door before realizing I was at the wrong apartment, on the wrong floor of the building. The actual resident opened the door while I was still jiggling the handle. This has happened twice now since I moved in a month ago and am still confused by the floor signage. FML
Today, I was leaving a café. I pushed confidently on the glass door… which didn’t move. I pulled. Nothing. I pushed again, harder. Still nothing. A barista finally yelled, “Other side!” as I realized I’d been wrestling with a decorative wall mirror. FML
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Top comments
FluffythePink 23
That's not dumb. Stop being so hard on yourself. I'm 40 something and my brain is still absolutely convinced that was is spelt 'whas'. It doesn't make me dumb, it's just a glitch in my personal matrix. Don't beat yourself up for being just as human as the next person.
RichardPencil 32
No one can. That's why signs exist. What smart people do is gently test the door first, no one can tell if their first guess is wrong. You look like a dunce if you go all-in on your first try and make a loud bang.
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Comments (4)
FluffythePink 23
That's not dumb. Stop being so hard on yourself. I'm 40 something and my brain is still absolutely convinced that was is spelt 'whas'. It doesn't make me dumb, it's just a glitch in my personal matrix. Don't beat yourself up for being just as human as the next person.
Charlie Given 28
if the handle is on the outside of the door you pull if the handle is on the inside of the door you push lol
whatshername?! 39
What do you do if there is a handle on both sides of the door, as it is commonly the case - at least where I live?
RichardPencil 32
No one can. That's why signs exist. What smart people do is gently test the door first, no one can tell if their first guess is wrong. You look like a dunce if you go all-in on your first try and make a loud bang.
UsernameNotRandom 10
I would not say you are stupid. Society is mollycoddled about everything. Prime example: "don't drink bleach" which seems pretty normal not to but we still need the label. Same for doors. Also, some doors are so fancy you can't tell. Just try it one way and if not, try the other, and make sure it's unlocked first.