Today, my boss delivered some flowers and a sympathy card signed by everyone in the office to my cubicle. The card said, "Sorry your mom died." My mom isn't dead. I don't know where they got the idea from and no one believes me. They said that denial is part of grieving. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went into work and noticed one of my fellow colleagues had a large bunch of flowers on her desk. As soon as I saw her, I immediately said, "Happy Birthday!" Everyone went quiet. It wasn't her birthday; her father had died. FML
Today, I got flowers sent to my work, I happily opened them in front of my co-workers thinking they were from my crush, I open the card to see "Love you, from mom". My mother thinks my love life is so pathetic, thats she needs to send me flowers to cheer me up. FML
Today, my mom received a condolence card from my high school's alumni association for my recent passing. I'm still alive! FML
Today, I called off work saying my Great Grandmother died. A co-worker texted me later asking where and when the funeral was. I made up a lie and said some random funeral home and date. My co-workers sent flowers to the funeral home for condolences. The flowers were returned. FML
Today, I was once again sent tons of Mother's Day cards in the mail, even though my son died years ago and I've told people that I'm not a mother anymore. FML
Today, my boss called me a liar and untrustworthy. Why? Yesterday I went home to grieve, after finding out my father figure is in hospice, but because he's just in hospice and not actually dead yet, that somehow means I lied about his death to get a day off work. What? FML
Today, my coworker left a tiny mess in the break room. I cleaned it up and jokingly said, "Your mother isn't here to clean up after you." She started crying. I forgot her mom died last week. FML
Today, a guy left flowers on my doorstep. I got home to find my dad claiming he bought them for my mum. I told my parents they were mine, they laughed in my face. FML
Today, at work, I misheard a customer telling me a story. To be polite, I did a slight laugh and nodded my head. She actually told me her mum had died. FML
Today, on the first occasion I've seen my boss since her brief leave, I brought up how I got to hear all our customers' heartwarming plans for their moms on Mother's Day. Her mother just died. That's why she was on leave. FML
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Top comments
PoptartsKid 13
Damn, I'm gonna miss her, she was a great woman.
umerin 32
Bring her into the office to meet your coworkers. That'll scare the shit out of them.
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Comments (94)
Gabnacious 7
Have a fake viewing at your home, saying she wanted people to view her body in bed, and if any of them come, have her jump up and scare them.
Chibi_Kitten 24
#16 reminds me of one of the national geographic magazine issue on the iPad. If you look at it long enough, the lion in the picture jumps out and scares you. Scarily realistic too.
23Z9TZO 18
its obviously a joke lol
91hayek 31
This could frustratingly turn into a Catch 22/Office Space styled bureaucratic nightmare. "But it says right here that your mother is dead. On this report. So we're going to believe it over you. Also this report says you're dead as well. Oh well, better notify payroll to stop paying you. Have a nice day!"
zandalee 20
Plot twist: OP's mum is a zombie.
TinyDude 10
Could be a collective effort to get you to leave the company :3 so sinister
lasagnanarcotics 14
Sorry for your loss bud.
sdroze1389 31
bring a chicken and a man dressed as a witch doctor in the office and say he's going to execute the chicken to awaken your mother's bones. someone will come clean before there is a headless chicken running around the office
goodylife101 2
Take a vacation and charge it to their ignorance
inner_peace 19
What happens if OP's mother actually dies?
Lil_Red777 21
Who said OP was terrible to them?
lolnoodles 3
lolol