Today, I told off my crazy sister-in-law after she made my wife cry for putting on weight during lockdown. Then, as I was sleeping in my armchair, the crazy bitch snuck into the house and cut off every single one of my meter-long dreadlocks. Now I got a BALD HEAD. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to my bratty younger sister cutting through my hair with a pair of scissors. I now look like a freak, and my mum bitched me out for being angry, all because my sister claimed she'd been sleep-walking. Her demented smirk said otherwise. FML
Today, we were running late because my hair got tangled in the curtains. My mother-in-law got so angry, she hacked at it, leaving me with a bald patch, then went and sat in the car as though we were still going anywhere with her. FML
Today, my mum started yelling at me for leaving scissors on my desk, which my five year-old sister found and chopped all her hair off. She had a lump of hair as proof. After three minutes of her yelling, me crying and apologizing, she laughed and said she was joking. She'd just given my sister a haircut. FML
Today, a crazy woman grabbed my hair and mentioned how lovely it was. She then asked when I would donate it. I told her I didn't want to, at which point she started yelling that she was going to get some scissors and cut it all off to teach me a lesson. FML
Today, not only was I kicked out of the house, but also from the family. What did I do? Fought betrayal with betrayal. What happened? Someone cut my long well kept hair, which they all disapproved of, down to stubble while I was asleep, and they all acted like they knew nothing. FML
Today, after agreeing to hang out with my husband and his alcoholic mother after his father’s suicide, my mother-in-law found out that my sister-in-law and I playfully insult each other. She lost her mind and practically bit my head off, relapsed, and blamed my “disrespecting her daughter” on said relapse. FML
Today, my sister shaved a chunk of my hair off while I was sleeping. I'm getting married in three days. FML
Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML
Today, and since we've had our baby, my mother-in-law started coming round more often, then bringing her stuff to stay overnight, then started claiming she lived here, and got hysterical when we told her she doesn’t. I had to pick her up and place her outside while she punched me in the head repeatedly. FML
Today, my little sister used scissors she got from school to cut my hair in the middle of the night while I was asleep. Now it looks like someone went at my hair with a chainsaw, and my school's dress code doesn't allow me to wear a hat or anything else to cover it up. FML
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Top comments
Amanda Howard 9
press charges
MidnaLink 35
That's assault, you're only lucky you didn't wake up during and get sliced or anything by the scissors.
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Comments (16)
demix_fml 32
That is classed as assault.
jbuckets_404 39
Better change/ re-key your locks and get a guard dog to stop that cra-cra biyatch!
TexasKitten79 6
Uh. I'd press charges for breaking & entering, and assault. and I'd file for e restraining order!
princess_stabitty 20
And that is the moment you press the charges, and possibly get a warrant to stop her from ever coming close to the both of you, like, ever again...
Emily Stryszko 3
press charges and get a restraining order
Chazzster 32
While OP did not deserve to have his hair cut off in any case, I have to wonder just how much alcohol OP had before “sleeping” so soundly that sister in law could cut off all his dreadlocks. She would have had to move his head to get to all the dreadlocks to cut them off so close to his head that he was bald. A normal sleeping person would wake up during this. I really wish people who had things done to them when they were passed out wouldn’t refer to it as “falling asleep”.
namine120409 42
This is a baseless accusation and has no bearing on the FML whether it’s true or not. Also I feel bad that the only deep sleepers you’ve ever met have been that way because of alcohol.