Today, I realized that when a girl asks what your plans are for Valentine's Day and you say, "Nothing" and she responds with, "Oh, I don't have any plans either", it means she wants you to take her out. It took me three months to figure that out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked a girl what time she'd like me to pick her up for our date tonight. She didn't know what I was talking about. It seems like, after months of sweaty palms, nervous smiles, and awkward sentences, I only dreamed she said yes to going out. FML
Today, two days after sending her flowers for Valentine's Day, my dream girl asked me on a date. She didn't show up. Her boyfriend did though. FML
Today, I asked the girl I'm madly in love with out to dinner. When she asked me if I would pay, I jokingly said, "Well, that depends on how the date goes." She looked me up and down and said, "No thanks then." FML
Today, I asked a girl I liked what she was doing tomorrow night. She replied, "Cleaning, so nothing really." I then asked her out to dinner. She declined. FML
Today, the girl I’ve had a crush on for months told me she scored a Tinder date and she’s so excited to go out with him. Just last week, I worked up the courage to ask her to be my girlfriend and she told me she doesn’t want a relationship, and “doesn’t believe in love anymore.” FML
Today, after trying really hard to impress a girl and thinking everything was going the right way, hugs, kisses and chatting every night, and trying to spend as much time together, I get told, "I don't know what I want, but I know what I don't want." Meaning me. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, I went out with a girl, I paid for the drinks, and thought everything went well, even though I didn’t make a move, I guess I wanted to take it slow. I texted later to invite her to a private beach next week, only for her to reply that she’s not gonna be available for the next few weeks because her boyfriend is coming to visit. FML
Today, I realized the reason I was asked to babysit 3 weeks ago for Feb 14 was because the old married couple with kids safely assumed that I wouldn't have a Valentine. FML
Today, the girl I've had a crush on for a year finally said she'd go out with me. On the way over to pick her up, she called me and said she couldn't go because she was going out to dinner with her ex-boyfriend to talk things over. She asked if she could use the reservations I had made. FML
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Top comments
Akerra89 14
That sucks! Well I'd ask her out to dinner all the same
f0xr0t 8
its a bit obvious that she wanted to go out with you, try to make it better maby buy her a bouquet of flowers?
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Comments (124)
Phyre24 17
That is some harem anime level density there.
Thorzix 23
ROFL good one.
RageAsNeeded 14
Poor OP :(
Rayth 19
Try to make up for it by asking her out if it's not too late.
Vanshikap 24
its ok OP,better late than never! ask her out now,make it super romantic and stuff. She'll be really happy.
kainpwnsu 19
So, you're an average, clueless male. Wait until you're married, tgen you'll ve expected to read her mind all the time. You'll get the hang of it.
kyliescott1 5
dumbass
Alastrina_fml 20
That's idiotic. I don't understand why women don't just say what they mean, instead playing these little head games, then get all pissed off when guys don't follow. I am a woman, so LADIES, follow this advice.....SAY WHAT YOU MEAN!!!!! Guys SUCK at mind-reading. They do not respond to hints, they do not respond to clues, they don't respond to obvious hints....Just ******* say what you mean!!!! I guarantee you will see a LOT less heartache and butthurt feelings!! [steps off soapbox]
Fou_Lou 20
^- This please. Having to play the guessing game is really annoying especially when it is done on purpose and when they get mad if you dont pick up on their "hints".
LennyComa 39
slowand steady wins the race
pussystank 18
Sounds like me, a non boyfriend material :D
Demonface54 20
As a guy, I think that we can all be clueless at some points.