Today, I was in a parking lot, doing donuts in my dad's car to rizz some baddies. It was going great until some dumbass got in the way and got launched twenty feet. I panicked, lost control of the car, and smashed into a decorative tree. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was driving around my campsite at dark in the middle of a forest. My father thought it would be funny to run up to my window, put his face against the glass and scream. I drove into a tree. FML
Today, I got to drive my mom's car. I'd recently watched the new Fast and Furious movie, I thought it'd be fun to drift around a few corners. I ended up smashing straight into someone's front yard. FML
Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML
Today, my son thought he'd take my new car for a drive without permission. He accelerated straight into a tree, reversed into a lamppost and then accelerated again into the neighbours car. FML
Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML
Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. I accidentally reversed while still in the driveway, and I instinctively hit the brakes. In my panic, I accidentally let go of the brakes, and ended up reversing straight into our house, all while my father yelled "NOOOOOO!" FML
Today, I was reversing my brother's car out of a driveway. I turned to my friend in the passenger seat and said, "Check it out, I'm so good at reversing!" Next minute there's a huge bang. I had just reversed into a tree and shattered the windscreen. FML
Today, in a rush to squeeze out of a particularly tight parking spot, I made a hurried 12-point turn. Just to make sure I had enough room behind, I hopped out of my car. It was still in reverse. I managed to wreck my own car without even sitting in it. FML
Today, I took my daughter out driving to practice for her road test. I told her to make a left into a parking lot. She missed the 30-foot wide entrance, but not the two-foot wide tree. FML
Today, I was stoked to show my new car to my friends that I pulled into the parking lot a bit too fast, attempting to look cool. I accidentally hit the curb and ended up scratching the entire front bumper on a trash can that I didn't see. Now I have a busted up bumper, and my friends will probably never let me forget it. FML
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Top comments
tiptoppc 21
The other guy: “Today, I woke up in a full body cast, as I got a launch worse than Blue Origin, by some asshat burning out in the flea market trying to impress some toddlers. My gift I got for my nephew with cancer was also destroyed. FML.”
jlc82 14
the dumbass in question was just someone trying to use the parking lot as it was intended
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Comments (5)
jlc82 14
the dumbass in question was just someone trying to use the parking lot as it was intended
tiptoppc 21
The other guy: “Today, I woke up in a full body cast, as I got a launch worse than Blue Origin, by some asshat burning out in the flea market trying to impress some toddlers. My gift I got for my nephew with cancer was also destroyed. FML.”
juggalo2 22
Gee, what was that guy thinking walking through your 'nut zone?
Hangryko 32
They're not the dumbass, you are. You could have killed someone, idiot. I hope you lose your licence forever for such disregard for others' lives.
BurnInDemonFire 39
I hope you're now in prison. Asshole.