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No smoke, no fire

By Anonymous - 25/03/2026 03:00

Today, a misunderstanding led to me falsely accusing my husband of cheating. We cleared it up and he forgave me and everything, but my parents are still convinced that he cheated, and won't believe me when I say he wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 503

Love is hell

By Anonymous - 29/03/2026 03:00

Today, after my long distance "boyfriend" told me he loved me more than the world, he asked for advice on how to talk to girls. He already has a girl from class in mind. What's worse is that I actually haven't broken up with him yet because I know about his home life. I can't help but feel like I wasted my time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 360

Impressive skills

By Anonymous - 30/03/2026 03:00

Today, I tried to impress my date by confidently parallel parking on a busy street. I hit the curb twice, stalled the car, and somehow set off my alarm. Then I locked the keys inside while it screamed. We stood there in silence while people watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 437

Passport bro

By ThaidUp - 31/03/2026 00:00

Today, I realized being a passport bro cost me my life’s savings and $40k credit card debt. I married a beautiful petite Thai girl molded out of my dreams, only for her to tell me six years later that she’s leaving me for her husband in Thailand. She’s a US Citizen now (thanks to me), and is now gonna sponsor him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 730

RIP Travis

By Fucking shithead asshole - 30/03/2026 15:00

Today, I came home to my daughter in her room, crying hysterically. She's been asking for a pet monkey for a few weeks, and my husband got tired of it and told her about Travis the Chimpanzee (don't look it up if you're squeamish). Thanks for ruining her innocence, prick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 374

Pure evil

By Anonymous - 03/04/2026 20:00

Today, my daughter admitted that she was the one who left all the used condoms in the back of my ex-husband's car, which led to us getting a horrible divorce because I thought he cheated and didn't believe him. I never suspected her for a minute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 118

You deserved it 249

Saucy minx

By Anonymous - 07/04/2026 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, when my date realised he wasn’t getting sex, even though it was the mythical third date when sex is supposedly guaranteed, he asked for the bill while I was still halfway through my main course, paid his share to the penny, and left. He'd driven me there, so I had to get a bus home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 36

Domesticated bliss

By Men make no sense - 08/03/2026 20:00

Today, as I watched my boyfriend bake cookies, I said he was "domesticated." He looked at me like I'd just pissed on his mother's grave and has been cold and distant all evening. What the fuck? It's a compliment, you dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 879

Sorry about your dick, bro

By footinmouth - 14/03/2026 22:00

Today, my wife and I were with friends when she said that men who like guns all have tiny penises. "Seriously, even smaller than me!" I added, and only realized what I'd said when the laughter started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 469

Commited

By oops - 07/04/2026 15:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I’m a junior developer and I'd pushed what I thought was a minor fix right before logging off on Friday. Monday morning, I walked into a message: “Site down since Saturday.” My “tiny change” broke a key function. The whole team was already in a call when I joined, and I had to say, "Yeah, um… that was my commit.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 289

Be careful what you wish for

By Cucked - 16/03/2026 03:00

Today, my wife agreed to live out my cuckold fantasy. I was watching her bang some guy from Tinder when my stomach suddenly turned and I realized I wasn't enjoying this as much as I hoped. I asked them to stop. They laughed and continued. I'm puking in the toilet and I can still hear them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 546

What did I do now?

By Friendless - 04/04/2026 20:00

Today, I connected two of my long time best friends. Upon chatting with each other, they discovered how toxic I was as a friend to both of them. They agreed that those traits don't exist anymore, but they are too hurt to continue their friendship with me. Fire away the YDI. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 445

In and out

By Maddison - 09/03/2026 09:00

Today, I had a double cheeseburger with a side of onion rings for lunch. Thirty minutes later my body reacted by giving me a bellyache and a HUGE need to shit. The good news, it was a normal pooh; it's just when I eat big, I go big. Bad. I was in his car with my guy when I "let go". He definitely noticed & smelled it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 435

I need it, I want it

By Asshole - 24/03/2026 20:00

Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 92

You deserved it 442

LOL what?

By Anonymous - 20/03/2026 12:00

Today, I realized that even if I want to have cute fun and admit when I was wrong, I still get "adulting sucks, get over it" when I joke that I "don't wanna grow apart or up too fast that you don't need me." Jesus, I realized after that there's no such thing as real love anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 342

Anger management

By Janisha - 21/03/2026 20:00

Today, our children were playing in the apartment, and I guess it made too much noise for the guy below, because he started banging on the ceiling. My boyfriend got so pissed that he grabbed his gun, stormed off, and threatened the guy below with it. He's on parole so I'm praying he doesn't report it to the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 831

Criminal behavior

By Get ur own spot fuckr - 11/03/2026 03:00

Today, I loosened the lug nuts on a guy's tires since he won't stop parking in my assigned spot and the rental authority refused to do anything. His tire flew off as he was tearing down the highway and he totaled his car. Now I might get charged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 1 131

Faux pas

By Anonymous - 29/03/2026 22:00

Today, as a graphic designer, I sent a “final” logo to a client after days of revisions. They replied that they loved it. Five minutes later I saw I'd left a hidden layer visible with a joke note that said “this version is the least ugly one.” I had to send a follow-up email claiming it was “an internal label that accidentally exported.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 429

On the move

By Anonymous - 03/04/2026 00:00

Today, my wife and I realized that we made a huge mistake in allowing our son to stay behind and live with my parents when we had to move cross-country due to work. Our lives are so empty without him and we're missing out on watching him grow up, but he refuses to come live with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 585

Keep it professional

By Heather and her dog - 30/03/2026 22:00

Today, during an important Zoom meeting, I insisted my dog was calm and well-behaved. To prove it, I picked him up. He immediately sneezed directly into my open mouth while my camera was on and my boss was speaking. Everyone saw and heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79

You deserved it 464

He got the hell out of there, became a new guy

By What is wrong with you - 05/04/2026 21:00 - United States

Today, my husband was home past his usual departure time for work, so I pointedly asked if he would be late. He said he called out sick. I stared at him, wide-eyed in disbelief, as he said he "wanted to relax in the yard with a book." He's completely lost his mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 615

Advice wanted

By Anonymous - 08/04/2026 00:00 - United States - Corona

Today, I’m about to lose the love of my life. I love this man with every fiber of my being, but his kids are absolute fucking monsters. They treat me like shit and he doesn’t intervene. I’m so heartbroken, but what else can I do? FML

I agree, your life sucks 79

You deserved it 12

Mistaken identity

By Crushed - 09/03/2026 15:00

Today, I saw a man at the gym glancing at me. I went over and said, "Are you ogling me?" kind of low key flirtatiously. He said, "No, I'm working out. Don't flatter yourself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 644

No more bring your kids to work days

By BadMom - 01/04/2026 22:00

Today, I took my 6 year-old to work. A normally docile child, she chased me around with her toy - beating me with it while all my colleagues watched - not stopping despite me requesting her to. When she finally lost said toy, she threw a huge tantrum. Guess who's banned from my office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 572

Music is music

By So boringgggggggg - 27/03/2026 12:00

Today, over the last year, my husband has gone from listening to normal people music to constantly listening to boring classical music thanks to his new coworkers. We went to a work party and he spent half the time debating dead white composer men. LISTEN TO REAL MUSIC, YOU WEIRDO! FML

I agree, your life sucks 76

You deserved it 949

Waste not, want not

By Anonymous - 21/03/2026 15:00

Today, my boyfriend sent me a long text breaking up with me and calling me "selfish", all because I fed my dog half of the roast he made us for dinner. He knows damn well I feed her a raw diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 826

Lost in music

By Anonymous - 15/03/2026 00:00

Today, I was listening to music with headphones in my usually quiet class. At one point I really got into the song so I just quietly sang along because why not. Turns out by the end of the song I was singing at full volume, almost yelling, and my friend stopped me to say that. The entire back row was laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 599

As he should

By Anonymous - 24/03/2026 12:00

Today, I sold all of my son's games and gadgets because he got a horrible report card. It turned out that the school made some sort of a mistake and it wasn't his actual report card. He actually got great grades. I tried to apologize but he told me to fuck off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74

You deserved it 1 213

Baby daddy drama

By please love me - 03/04/2026 22:00

Today, I was on a first date with a really nice guy and, of course, when there was an awkward silence, I started talking and realized too late that I was running through my usual complaints about my worthless baby daddies. He asked how many and I said three, and he left without a word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 1 006

Cold dish for dinner

By Zia - 25/03/2026 20:00

Today, as soon as I got home, my husband said he was hungry and that I needed to cook. I flipped my shit and yelled at him for a good half hour. Later, he pulled out his phone and showed me videos of me doing the exact thing to him, asking him to do things the second he walked in the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68

You deserved it 881

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The Top

Today, I hooked up with this man for the first time. He takes his shirt off and has a chestful of black hair. He had his name shaved into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 090

You deserved it 8 701

Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 690

You deserved it 43 232

Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 832

You deserved it 6 976

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 037

You deserved it 11 447

Today, on an 11-hour flight, I had to throw up. I managed to calmly walk to the bathroom and be violently sick in the toilet. After cleaning up, I was proud nobody had noticed and left the stall. A hot flight attendant was already waiting for me with a glass of water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 002

You deserved it 458

Today, after a year and a half, I finally cut things off with my ex completely because I was starting to have feelings for someone else. Right after I cut my ex off, the other girl that I liked cut things off with me, and threw my ass in the friendzone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 584

You deserved it 1 944