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I'm dying over here!

By Anonymous - 12/07/2025 03:00 - United States - Canton

Today, I choked on oatmeal, watered-down soupy oatmeal. It seemed to get stuck halfway down. I chucked up several spoonfuls. My wife was oblivious to all the noise I was making because she had her over-the-ear headphones on, listening to some stupid YouTube video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 206

You deserved it 275

Wardrobe malfunction

By Anonymous - 14/07/2025 03:00 - United States - Amarillo

Today, I realized after I had already left my house that my skirt was inside out and backwards. I’d been walking around like that for two hours before a stranger in a supermarket politely told me. The worst part? I still had to finish my grocery shopping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 172

Scammers gonna scam

By Leah Magers - 19/07/2025 05:00 - United States - Ames

Today, my friend went to jail after shoplifting over 2000$ worth of Apple Pay cards for her online boyfriend. We have all told her it's a scam and she is facing five years in prison. She won't listen to anyone and won't believe he's a con artist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 109

Maybe that's a good idea?

By Anonymous - 21/07/2025 09:00 - Germany - Ergoldsbach

Today, I told my parents about my life problems, after they forced me to open up. Now they want to send me to a psychiatrist. Don't trust anyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 172

Watch people poop

By Anonymous - 28/07/2025 09:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I decided to fix my squeaky door by following a DIY YouTube video, because the noise was really annoying. I took the entire door off its hinges... and couldn’t get it back on. I had door-less bathroom and my roommates had many questions before actually asking if they could help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 467

Sigma grindset

By Anonymous - 30/07/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my dad tells everyone I’m still living in his house farting around on the internet. I’m a software engineer and I invest in the stock markets. I live in his house because I bought it off him when he fell behind on his own mortgage. I’ve been earning more than him since I was 22. FML

I agree, your life sucks 609

You deserved it 87

Where are you?

By Anonymous - 31/07/2025 22:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I spent 20 minutes calling for my cat, worried she’d escaped. I found her in the bathroom, sitting in the sink, calmly watching me yell her name. She didn’t even flinch. I realized I’d been shouting “Fluffy!” at the open window. All my neighbors now probably know my cat’s name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 357

Bad idea

By No sex for a decade, at least - 04/08/2025 12:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, we went to an amusement park, or tried to. My idiot husband stuck his hand under his shirt like a gun and demanded free passes and "all the cash" as a joke. He's banned for life, they escorted us off the premises, and my children are inconsolable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 639

You deserved it 174

Say it, don't spray it

By Yak - 09/08/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, I heard my coworker sneeze on the other side of the break room, and right after I felt something wet hit my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 52

How could you be so heartless?

By Bruh - 11/08/2025 08:00 - Mexico - Mexico City

Today, my mother and my sister chewed me out for not attending my sister's birthday party. I'm sorry for having both of my fucking legs broken in a motorcycle accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 523

You deserved it 63

Tech report

By Anonymous - 13/08/2025 09:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, due to a change in our internal system, I set up an email filter at work that sent all incoming messages to spam. My boss had been sending me urgent updates all day, and I only realized when she came over and asked why I’d “gone radio silent.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 401

Law and order

By Karen - 15/08/2025 03:00

Today, I was walking my dog when he decided to poop in the middle of a crosswalk during heavy traffic. We have very strict laws (and fines) so I frantically tried to pick it up while cars waited, honking and watching me struggle like I was in the worst street performance ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 101

Pinhead

By Anonymous - 16/08/2025 13:00 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I'm 35 years-old and I had to buy myself a hat from the kids section. FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 96

Mean Girls 3

By Anonymous - 20/08/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, a grown-ass woman has launched a Mean Girl-type hate campaign against my daughter. This petty bitch is mad because my daughter is allowed to join the varsity teams while her daughter didn’t make it. My high school days are behind me but I’m ready to meet this bitch in the parking lot. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 90

Sabotage

By FuckUp - 24/08/2025 00:00 - Germany

Today, I can't afford to lose my job but I've been consciously sabotaging my job for months now. My manager pulled me aside to let me know that I am untrustworthy and need to improve. I'm smart and have no idea why I'm doing this to myself. I had a great work ethic in my previous job, even winning awards for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131

You deserved it 495

Seething rage

By ninja0609x93 - 25/08/2025 14:00 - United States - North Augusta

Today, it's yet another day complete strangers come up to my brother's girlfriend and compliment on her "spectacular charisma" and how she can "brighten people's day without speaking to them." She's a wannabe Disney singer, a little fat, and a ginger. I'm a 3 and 4 level cheerleader! WTF?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 65

You deserved it 1 122

Toxic waste

By Anonymous - 27/08/2025 06:00 - United States - North Hollywood

Today, while apartment hunting with my boyfriend, I needed to use the bathroom. We were on our own and no toilet paper. Fortunately I carry wipes with me, because I had to more than just pee. All was fine, until I tried to flush and realized the water was turned off. The next person will get quite the surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 380

Street cred

By Anonymous - 29/08/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my daughter has been making up horrible lies about her home life to impress some new friends. Since when is having two highly involved, loving parents with good careers and a nice home an embarrassment? FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 67

Chill out, dude

By Anonymous - 31/08/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He broke down crying because his mother is going to be so mad at him. He’s in his 30’s and we've lived together for over 4 years, it’s not like it was a drunken mistake, it just happened naturally. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 126

Make it make sense

By Not420Friendly - 01/09/2025 13:00 - United States - North Hollywood

Today, I fixed my car starter for $700 because I worked as a delivery driver for a weed company. I went into work and my boss promptly fired me. For fixing a car. To do my job. Which I need, to pay off the car. He even smiled as he said, “Well this is gonna be real awkward for you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 99

Respect the hustle

By Anonymous - 05/09/2025 12:00 - South Africa - Nelspruit

Today, I found out, after months of being made to think I'm crazy, that my girlfriend has a complete online presence across 10+ cam/OnyFans/websites/Telegram, etc. It's my biggest trigger, my previous partner did the same on a much bigger scale. She denied it to the point of me moving out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 101

Emoji etiquette

By Anonymous - 12/09/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, my coworker texted me about her grandmother passing away. I meant to send a sad face but accidentally sent the party hat emoji. Now she probably thinks I was celebrating her grandma’s death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 301

I blame the parents

By Anonymous - 15/09/2025 22:00

Today, my tired son and I were riding a shuttle bus. An old lady got on, and I told him we needed to get up so she could have the seat. He started crying and screamed, "WHY? She's old, she's gonna die soon!" I wanted to melt into the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 168

I'm having a hard time, OK?

By Anonymous - 19/09/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I handed my phone to the cashier so they could scan my digital coupons. I forgot I had my grocery list open in Notes. The top of the list read: “1) Wine. 2) More wine. 3) Emergency chocolate. 4) Hide evidence.” The cashier didn’t say anything, just smirked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 315

Kinda gross

By Anonymous - 21/09/2025 09:00

Today, while stripping the bed, I noticed black dots on my husband's side of the mattress, and only on his side. That’s when I realised it was mould, because he doesn’t like to towel dry, he likes to let the fan dry him while he’s lying on the bed wet and warm, perfect for mould. Idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 77

Those were some hefty dogs

By NeedsANewPhone - 23/09/2025 03:00

Today, after getting my phone fixed last week because my daughter dropped it and it landed on a corner, I dropped it again at the dog park and several big dogs fighting with my dog stepped on it. One of them cracked the screen again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 274

You deserved it 154

Couch potato

By Chelsea - 24/09/2025 22:00

Today, I was trying to lower the volume on my TV, but nothing was happening. I got increasingly frustrated, smacking the remote and yelling at the screen. My brain finally woke up when I realized I was holding the air conditioning remote and had been turning my living room into a freezer instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 411

Another brick in the wall

By Anonymous - 28/09/2025 12:00

Today, I had a four and a half hour Saturday detention for skipping a regular detention. We had to wear full school uniform then sit at our desks and write an essay for two hours, then a 15 minute break, then another two hours of essay writing. I thought it was a cruel and harsh punishment, but did I deserve it? FML

I agree, your life sucks 106

You deserved it 694

Desperate housewives

By Anonymous - 02/10/2025 00:00

Today, I thought I was waving at my neighbor, who was also waving enthusiastically back. After smiling and gesturing, I realized she was actually cleaning her windows. I was flirting with Windex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 248

You deserved it 175

Noise annoys

By AAAAAGH - 03/10/2025 20:00

Today, like every day, I have misophonia. Also today, like every day, my mom is on a video call with my baby niece and is making irritating sound effects to entertain her. I hate the fact that my mom making her granddaughter happy makes me irrationally furious. I'm such a piece of shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 122

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The Top

Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 716

You deserved it 18 731

Today, my husband told me that for our anniversary he will be watching the UFC fight, because it is, "one of the biggest events ever and he just can't miss it." Apparently, our one-year wedding anniversary is not as important. To add to it, he said we should watch it together. Very romantic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 670

You deserved it 578

Today, I work in sales and my coworker was activating two lines. A customer walks up to her and gets checked in. She finds out he wanted to activate as well. I was finishing up with a customer but instead of me helping this next guy, she made him wait for her instead. I got no sales today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 80

Today, I asked my boyfriend if I looked alright for our date. He said, "Honey, you look fine, just don't go out in public like that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 063

You deserved it 6 260

Today, I was driving home with my dad after buying a new truck. We were on the freeway and the engine wasn't revving up very much. My dad thought that something was wrong with my transmission, so he reached over to change gears. Most cars won't go into reverse at high speeds. Mine does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 253

You deserved it 3 136

Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 177

You deserved it 6 765