The Top

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The growth

By Deenadd - 19/10/2023 16:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I discovered an open wound right above my penis. I can’t put a Bandaid on it because the hair down there repels it. There’s something repulsive about seeing something like that on your own body, especially when you just want to jerk off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 337

Kinda vague but oddly specific

By sheslayedgames - 12/04/2025 00:00 - United States - Powell

Today, you talked loud enough for me to hear you calling me the bad guy, while we’re in the same house. The walls are paper thin. After 19 years, I find out our friendship was a lie? That you used me just to make my parents happy? And I find out now, three weeks before I move out? This is beyond hurtful. I can’t take this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 158

Recruitment hell

By aidenti - 23/10/2023 20:00

Today, I've applied to 300 jobs in the past 4 months, gotten 7 interview, 2 of which have gone to a third round and I'm still unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 96

Do something, anything

By Anonymous - 16/04/2025 03:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I was assigned to work on a group project with some coworkers. The entire time, one guy insisted on "taking charge" and assigning everyone tasks. He gave me a single task: “Create a 15-slide presentation.” I completed it in less than an hour. He then decided we needed a 100-slide presentation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 453

You deserved it 78

Password issues

By Anonymous - 27/03/2009 16:46 - United States

Today, I had to log in to my computer on a projector in front of business associates at my dad's architecture firm. I typed in my username and apparently didn't hit the tab key hard enough, so I typed my password in the username box. The entire firm now knows my password is "tits123". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 981

You deserved it 77 211

Virallity gone wrong

By Anonymous - 18/04/2025 15:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a screenshot of an old tweet of mine went viral. Unfortunately, it was completely taken out of context, thinking it was saying the opposite of what I actually meant, and now I’m trending on both “Libs of TikTok” and “Woke Watch” or whatever the fuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 370

Bad day, huh?

By Anonymous - 28/10/2023 14:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I had a Tesla nearly run me off the road. Then after I parked, I crossed the street at a crosswalk. A car stopped for me, rolled his window down, then yelled at me for wearing a black raincoat. Mean people make me want to be mean to everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 175

I get it

By Anonymous - 30/10/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, I caught the sickness going around, which meant I had to cancel concert tickets, classes I was supposed to take, and turn down a once-in-a-lifetime reservation. The universe doesn't want me to experience good things. Message received. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 128

Visual effect

By Anonymous - 25/04/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend suggested I try on some old clothes, after weeks of eating better and exercising. The good news: they fit again, and are even a little bit loose. The bad news: somehow, I look fatter now than I did before I started trying to lose weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 88

Just what I needed to hear…

By RedGinger - 29/07/2022 18:00

Today, my cat woke me up an hour early so I could listen to my neighbors having sex at 6 a.m. My husband died 6 months ago, and was very sick for the previous 4 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 174

You deserved it 176

Knackered

By Anonymous - 27/04/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I was feeling tired after a work meeting, so I took a quick power nap in my office before my next meeting. When I woke up, I thought I was still in a meeting, but I had been asleep for an hour. In my panic, I tried to act cool, but I had to walk past all my coworkers, who were wondering why I looked like a zombie walking into a meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 352

The nerve of this guy

By Fairla31 - 24/07/2022 14:00 - United States - Tampa

Today, my ex asked me if he could live with me so he wouldn't be homeless. He also asked if he could introduce me to his new girlfriend so they wouldn't have "trust issues." This coming from the same guy living with grandma and mom, who has no job, no car, and basically dumped me for her. Like, sure buddy I'll get right on making her feel comfortable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 150

Can't we just get along?

By Anonymous - 29/04/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I tried to host a “non-political” BBQ with extended family. Despite my best efforts to avoid politics being brought up, within 30 minutes someone brought up swing states, voter suppression, and deepfake campaign ads. The hamburgers were barely defrosted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 154

Road to nowhere

By Anonymous - 05/11/2023 06:00 - Canada

Today, I was driving to an important job interview, and I was running late. Just as I was about to get on the highway, I saw my ex standing by the road with a flat tire. I stopped to help because I'm a nice person. Turns out, the spare tire was also flat. We called for a tow truck, and I missed my interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 580

Flimsy excuse

By Anonymous - 04/05/2025 22:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, my fiancee broke up with me, all because I told her I couldn't install a home security system, fix a camera, and entertain her son in the hour before I went to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 581

You deserved it 85

Healthcare for all

By Jill_Free_Woods - 19/07/2022 22:00

Today, I was sitting down to do my homework when I severely sprained my ankle. I live on the third floor and can’t walk far without severe pain, and I'm broke, so a compression bandage is out of the question. I can’t wait until the first of the month when I get paid again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 935

You deserved it 155

Popularity contest

By Anonymous - 07/05/2025 12:00 - China - Shanghai

Today, I broke ties with a friend of mine. She said I was her only friend and asked me not to interact with others normally. I'd had enough, and asked her not to bother me again. Then I found out that everyone liked her better and left me alone for lunch, even though she's a gaslighter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 110

Understanding

By Anonymous - 11/11/2023 06:00

Today, after I met a girl on Tinder I would very much like to date, we finally arranged our first date. As I rushed to my car in my best suit, I had a flat tire. The trains had stopped running, and a taxi to that distance was easily £200. She accused me of being a catfish and blocked my number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 513

You deserved it 112

Someone check in on this guy

By Klinger - 08/05/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom and slipped on some soap on the floor while I was washing my hands. As I fell, I grabbed the nearest thing to break my fall, which happened to be the hand dryer. It fell off the wall and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 89

Uncomfortable encounter

By Klo - 12/11/2023 16:00

Today, I was set to meet my friends at a new, trendy café. I arrived early, eager to impress, but ended up walking into the wrong café and got stuck for an hour engaged in a disturbing conversation about serial killers with a total stranger who'd deludedly mistaken me for a long-lost friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 307

Messy situation

By Need help - 16/11/2023 22:00 - United States

Today, my wife called me at work to yell at me because the house is a mess. She hasn't helped me clean in over two years, and when I ask for help, there's always a new excuse, headache, tired from work, stress, etc. FML

I agree, your life sucks 688

You deserved it 118

Development purgatory

By hulfilvia - 16/05/2025 00:00

Today, I have been working on making a video game for three years, I'm tired and I want to quit, but the sunk cost is too much and I can't let it go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 178

Communication breakdown

By Anonymous - 18/11/2023 06:00

Today, I tried to tell my boyfriend how I have been feeling recently in our relationship. He lashed out at me, saying I was just accusing him of being the bad guy. I guess I'll never express my feelings ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 537

You deserved it 188

By tb351 - 28/05/2011 23:37 - United States

Today, I asked my kids if I looked good before going to work. Smiling, they told me I looked wonderful. It wasn't until I got to work and looked into the mirror until I noticed my left eyebrow was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 496

You deserved it 8 468

Looking good

By Gracie - 20/05/2025 12:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, at the gym, I caught sight of myself in the mirror while lifting weights and thought, “Damn, I look good!” I smiled. Then I realized the mirror was actually a window. A group of people outside had been watching me flex with a shit-eating grin on my face for God know how long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 577

Little cuties

By DanielleinDC - 22/05/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I washed the comforter one of my nine-month-old kittens peed on last night. Just as soon as my boyfriend put it on the bed, she peed on it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 143

SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UUUUUP!

By Anonymous - 23/11/2023 18:00 - Hong Kong - Kowloon

Today, my colleagues at work sitting next to me are so open during phone calls. They always switch on their phone's speaker to the maximum volume, forcing everybody to hear what they and their counterparties say. Whilst the meeting rooms on our floor are still vacant, they don't even bother to go inside for their phone calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 108

Driving me mad

By Anonymous - 24/05/2025 12:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I kept hearing a weird buzzing sound in my apartment. I turned off everything, unplugged appliances, and was on the verge of calling maintenance. Turns out, it was my electric toothbrush vibrating in my suitcase… for three hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 156

You deserved it 378

Bad boy

By VtecKickIn - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was driving home with my girlfriend. As we turned onto our block, she shrieked that our dog was running down the street and into traffic. I jumped out of the moving car and chased him for about a mile, only to give up, go home, and find out it wasn't our dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 251

You deserved it 5 812

Home sweet home

By Hungry dad - 27/05/2025 09:00 - United States - New York

Today, I made a sandwich. When I went to grab chips, my wife snatched it. I made a second sandwich. My son came in and stole the plate when I was grabbing a seltzer. I went to make a third sandwich. No more cold cuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 513

You deserved it 129

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The Top

Today, I walked to Starbucks. On the way a homeless guy asked me for change and I lied and said I had no money. On my way back, Strawberry Frappuccino in hand, the same guy recognized me. He followed me for 3 blocks, swearing and yelling at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 158

You deserved it 61 015

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 005

You deserved it 313 061

Random

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 769

You deserved it 3 224

Today, I tried to fight my girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend because she told me he used to beat her. Turns out, she was lying to “impress” me, and her ex has a black belt in taekwondo. I’m in excruciating pain right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 099

You deserved it 4 831

Today, the guy I met on Tinder texted me about our date tomorrow. He seemed nervous. I come to find out his mom overheard us talking on the phone and wants to meet me. I said OK, that’s not big deal. That’s when he told me that he’s actually 17. I now hate myself because I’m 26. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 979

You deserved it 312

Today, a tattoo artist angrily threw me out of his store because an "88" tattoo is apparently a Nazi thing, representing “Heil Hitler.” I just wanted my birth year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 987

You deserved it 541

Today, the device I bought to gradually stretch my penis longer arrived in the mail. I'm too small to get it to stay on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 597

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation, to find my fiance had cleaned the house top to bottom, and finished three projects he was constantly putting off. I was over the moon, until he said, "Yeah, when you're not nagging me all day, I can actually get shit done. Crazy, huh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 205

You deserved it 864