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King of pain

By Anonymous - 24/01/2026 22:00

Today, I somehow strained a muscle around my ribs that make any movement or pressure almost unbearable. In other words, breathing is just about possible, farting is excruciating, and I’m praying I get diarrhea, otherwise there's no possible way I’m going to be able to shit without passing out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 59

Treat yourself with kindness

By Anonymous - 26/01/2026 16:41

Today, I got so sad and depressed looking at my old pictures. I had such bad body dysmorphia from all the mean, nasty, hateful things my horrid family used to bully me for that I never realized I was actually pretty. Now thanks to an autoimmune disease my body will never look nor feel the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 264

You deserved it 37

Hate the game, not the player

By Anonymous - 13/02/2026 09:00

Today, I really liked this girl, and it seemed like she maybe liked me too. We texted a lot, she invited me to a party, and we played games together. I asked her out, worried about waiting too long, but got a really ambiguous answer. Now she’s playing the same games she used to ask me to play, just with a different guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 83

Gamers will know

By Its painfully bad - 15/02/2026 03:00

Today, my wife got bored and went into my collection of old PC games. She started playing Mass Effect and commented that she loved it and wanted to play all three. I don't know how to tell her that it ends worse than Game of Thrones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 91

Fuse ignited

By Anonymous - 16/02/2026 22:00

Today, I got sick of my mother-in-law telling me everything I do brings shame to the family, so I meanly asked if her other son spending three months in prison was shameful or if he was already forgiven. It turned out that he told her he'd spent three months touring Brazil. Cue massive family screaming match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 83

Did it taste good at least?

By Anonymous - 24/02/2026 03:00

Today, I popped something straight out of the oven into my mouth. It burned my tongue instantly, but instead of spitting it out, I swallowed. I felt it burning all the way down. Now I can’t eat solid food or drink hot drinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 651

Real estate from hell

By pukey mcgee - 25/02/2026 22:00

Today, I learned why I got such a great deal on my apartment. It's located next to the trash chute. It smells utterly foul three days of the week, and it's the dead of winter now. I dread the summer heat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 68

I have had it with these mf snakes on this mf plane! Everybody strap in!

By Who's your daddy, snake girl? - 08/03/2026 15:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for refusing to have anything to do with "our" pet snake. The same snake I told him not to buy for his son a few months ago, because I knew the kid would get bored with it and dump the responsibility onto us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 79

Drive on

By Anonymous - 10/03/2026 09:00

Today, as a breakdown technician, I was sent to a woman whose jeep wouldn’t start. The tank was empty, and when I told her she got pissy, then calmed down and asked where to buy spare tires because her jeep didn’t have one. I actually had to show her the tire in the round storage case on the back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 64

Lookalike

By Anonymous - 17/03/2026 12:00

Today, I finally got with the hot guy from work. We were laying in bed, smiling at each other afterwards, when his eyes traveled down my body and he blurts out, "THAT'S who you look like! Have you ever seen Moana? Yeah, you look JUST like THAT MAUI GUY! WOW!" I'm a woman. A 5ft4 woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 282

You deserved it 108

Baby Jane

By Anonymous - 02/04/2026 12:00

Today, the boss accidentally merged her personal calendar with the office calendar, so along with a 10 a.m. waxing appointment and on the 19th it's "Mom's birthday", I got to see "Friday 3rd April fire Jane." I’m Jane. (Not my real name obviously, but you know what I mean). FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 74

What in the world…?

By May - 16/04/2026 18:00 - United States

Today, I noticed I was overcharged at a fast food place, so I asked the cashier to correct it. He got an attitude, so I asked for the manager. The next thing I know, some dude shoved me, yelling, "Shut the fuck up Karen." I fell and hit my head. People in line laughed and cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 117

Quite the list

By Anonymous - 18/04/2026 14:00 - United States - Rock Hill

Today, I have scoliosis, neck compensation, TMJ osteoarthritis, a small brain lesion, unilateral hearing loss in left ear, malocclusion dentally/skeletally, pelvic issues, knee issues, gait/feet/leg issues, asymmetric looks and aesthetic issues, and struggling with hobbies/entertainment because of hearing issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 75

i'm late

By Fluster time - 22/04/2026 09:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I work remotely and had an online meeting with clients in different time zones. I double-checked the time… or so I thought. I joined 30 minutes late, rushed in apologizing, only to realise I had actually logged into the wrong meeting entirely and interrupted another team’s presentation. My actual meeting had already ended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 468

Big Tony

By lordoftheweird - 06/05/2026 07:00 - Canada - Cranbrook

Today, my grandmother is upset I won't lie to the police for her and is now claiming that I'm involved in the Mafia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 365

You deserved it 61

Dang!

By Anonymous - 09/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my husband allowed his 16-year-old daughter to get married. Every single objection and concern I had, they ignored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 83

Congratulations, you played yourself

By Danny - 22/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I realized the only person who’s ever loved me was an old friend. She was an amazing girl, she was there for me at my highs and lows, but I didn’t find her attractive, so I turned her down. She has since then moved on and gotten married, while I’m still getting played left and right by women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 607

Naughty boy

By Anonymous - 19/06/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I have to wear glasses for the first time in my life and my husband won’t stop pestering me because I now look like a librarian, which gets his nerd engine revving like mad. Don’t get me wrong, I’m liking the affection, and who doesn’t want sex more often, but not 2-3 times a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 223

Where am I?

By I hate myself - 21/06/2025 15:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I thought I was going to a friend’s birthday party. Turns out, it was a surprise party for someone else... and I was the surprise. Everyone shouted “Surprise!” and I realized I wasn’t invited. I awkwardly ate a cupcake and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 101

Stop!

By Anonymous - 03/07/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to take a nice picture of my dad but he was just doing stupid-looking poses, so I got mad and told him to "stop acting like a prostitute" without knowing what that even means. Keep in mind, this was also in front of my mum and oldest sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 675

**** brainrot

By Anonymous - 23/07/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, while playing cards, me and my boyfriend were getting super competitive and started wagering sexual stuff. His first and only choice: anal. Why only anal? All the time anal, there’s hundreds of other things to try, why do men always go straight to anal? It’s gets boring after a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 230

Leg day

By NervousDog - 06/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, at work, I dropped a dried giant millipede specimen. Horrible little legs went everywhere. Now I need to glue it back together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 119

You're fit but don't you know it

By Anonymous - 10/08/2025 12:00 - Canada

Today, I was running at the gym, feeling like a fitness influencer. I increased the treadmill speed to “sprint” mode. My shoelace got caught in the belt, and I was launched backward into a rack of yoga mats, knocking them over like bowling pins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 352

Karma?

By Pristine-Praline-977 - 02/09/2025 15:00

Today, it's been 5-ish years since I bought my condo. Last year, my washer became unbalanced and flooded my entire place and I had to do a total remodel. Everyone said, “What a freak accident, nothing like this will happen again!” Today the hot water supply line to the sink burst and flooded my condo. What did I do in a past life? FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 79

Night terror

By Freaked OUT - 06/09/2025 03:00 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I woke up to my roommate screaming. Turns out, I had sleepwalked into her bed during the night. I don’t remember anything, but apparently I told her, “Shhh, don’t mention the ducks” before laying down next to her and fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 111

Not helping

By Missy - 23/09/2025 20:00

Today, after feeling down due to another negative pregnancy test after my hubby and I have been trying for over a year, my mom insisted I come to a BBQ to "cheer me up." I get there and what do I see? Blue and pink balloons. My sister was announcing her pregnancy. My mom got pissed at me when I walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 198

Squeak day

By Nathalie - 30/09/2025 22:00

Today, I wore new shoes to work. They squeaked with every single step on the office building's lino floor. People thought it was funny at first, but then I had to walk across the entire office to the printer, going "squeak, squeak, squeak" for 45 seconds straight. By the time I got back, my nickname was now apparently “Squeaker of the house.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 102

Breaking news

By Anonymous - 08/10/2025 00:00

Today, after nerve pain and trouble sitting down, I found a lump in my ass crack. My doctor thought might be a tumour or cancer, so I was sent for scans. Apparently my whole life I’ve had an ingrown vestigial tail at the bottom of my spine hidden under the skin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 70

Get on with it

By Fred - 13/10/2025 09:00

Today, I got home at 6:30 after a 12-hour shift. I sat down on the sofa, and my wife immediately stomped in and said, "Why are you sitting doing nothing? Get up, there's a million things to do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 79

Stinky

By Anonymous - 16/10/2025 22:00

Today, I spent an hour blaming my dog for a weird smell in the house. I even gave him a lecture about “being a good boy.” I later realized the smell was coming from the ham and cheese omelet I'd left in the microwave two days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 654

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The Top

Today, I noticed that my two cats have been urinating on my Christmas tree skirt more frequently than in their litter box. I've tried to get them to stop, but I don't know how. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 129

You deserved it 1 081

Today, I was texting this guy i've liked for a really long time, because of how nice and sentimental he is. We were sending each other things like "You make me smile" and "You're so damn cute" when finally he said "Let's just stop texting and hook up already." So much for sentimental. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 476

You deserved it 42 994

Today, I was was leaving the library when I noticed an elderly woman being mugged. I was about to leave on my bike, but promptly went to help her. After I managed to scare off the mugger, I helped her to her car. As I was heading back to my bike, I notice the mugger riding off on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 522

You deserved it 4 931

Today, I let my 5 year old play on my tablet while we were both using one of those family restrooms with two toilets. She took a selfie showing both on us on the toilet and sent it to my husband. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 1 721

You deserved it 1 303

Today, I had to call a locksmith because I got locked out of my apartment. It cost a total of $350 to break in and repair the lock. Not even 3 hours later, I dropped my only key in the sewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 990

You deserved it 837

Today, I accidentally broke one of my mom’s favorite glasses while she was away. My dad saw and offered to tell her instead that he broke it, because, "let’s face it, if she knew it was you, she’d shove the glass shards down your fucking throat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 606

You deserved it 142