The Top

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Toot toot

By I…… - 10/08/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I was relaxing on the sofa with the cat purring on my lap. My husband blasted an air horn. I'm now covered in cat scratches and piss, from both myself and the cat. I'm going to skin him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 92

Consumer complaint

By Lolet - 13/08/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom - Telford

Today, I spent £65 on a pair of jeans after scouring Depop & eBay for hours, only for literally my dream jeans to then pop up in "More recommended" after purchasing, and for a cheaper price and faster shipping, after six hours of searching and spending the last of my paycheck on non-refundable jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 251

You deserved it 397

Fireworks

By Louis - 17/08/2025 12:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I tried to warm soup in a travel mug. I forgot to take the metal spoon out. The microwave lit up like a firework display, and I screamed so loudly that my neighbor knocked on my door to check if I was alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 499

Ignorance never dies

By Racist ass - 22/08/2025 14:00 - United States - New York

Today, my husband told our daughter to eat with her fork, not her hands. She said that in Africa, people eat with their hands. He said, "Yeah, and they cut up little girls' vaginas with a razor blade there too." Now she's traumatized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 178

Bye!

By Anonymous - 24/08/2025 14:00 - Ireland

Today, I was finishing up an internship so while driving past the other interns I said, "Bye losers!" as a joke. It turns out that the CEO was with them and fully heard me yell that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 683

Work ain't for everyone

By Embarrassed - 29/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, it was my third day at my new job. It was super hectic; before long, I got so confused and overwhelmed, I had a full-blown emotional breakdown in front of my coworkers. My boss offered sympathy, telling me I could go home and he would never make me work on days like that again, but I still feel pathetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 297

What are you doing?

By BitchWhat - 02/09/2025 12:00 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, we're on a group family vacation with our old roommates from college. In the ten years in between, I forgot how much I hate their lazy asses already. I'm doing more than usual on this vacation, I cook, clean, and take care of their kids, only for one to ask, "What were you doing for so long?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 352

You deserved it 152

Same

By Anonymous - 16/09/2025 12:00

Today, I hate my life. I'm too smart, too dumb. I'm 5 year single after a horrific marriage and I can't seem to make any ground since. No one likes me. I can't find a job. I wish I would have died in the numerous car wrecks I've been in. This life has been too hard and I fucking hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 131

Collector's delight

By what is wrong with people - 18/09/2025 09:00

Today, my boyfriend said he had a "long nose hair" collection. I laughed, thinking it was a joke. He then showed me a tin of long-ass hairs. I gagged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 119

Keep it to yourself

By Anonymous - 30/09/2025 20:00

Today, I had to have the awkward conversation with my adult daughter that the reason I’m divorcing her mom is because she’s not my daughter, she’s actually the daughter of her mom's secret boyfriend, who she’s been screwing behind my back for almost 30 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 67

**** ICE

By Melinna - 06/10/2025 03:00

Today, the lady whose house I clean insists I stole her Hermes bag. I never went into her closet when cleaning; just her kitchen, living room and bathrooms. Apparently, it's worth $4000. She threatened to "call ICE and Homeland Security" if I don't "cough it up." I'm a naturalized citizen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 655

You deserved it 79

Dick move

By Anonymous - 07/10/2025 22:00

Today, my wife insisted on getting burgers at like 11:58, two minutes before the place closed, which was a dick move. As she’s placing her order, I clearly heard the guy in the back going, “For fuck's sake…” as he restarted the grill. I wouldn’t have blamed him if he spit in her fries, honestly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 94

Enough!

By PoisonIvy - 26/10/2025 12:00

Today, everything I touch goes wrong or into the trash. Whatever I do at work, I screw up somehow (in new ways every time) and get blamed. I worked for months on something, only for it to be scrapped. I just feel like I should give up on everything, including life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 100

Rash decision

By Anonymous - 31/10/2025 20:00

Today, while looking for some self care, my cousin and I found a recipe for homemade face masks. We were vulnerable enough to try it and ended up with bright red faces instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 340

Moody git

By Anonymous - 30/11/2025 22:00

Today, trying to be nice, I replaced my husband's old falling apart arm chair with a new one, same brand, same material, same colour, except this one also reclines, has a built in reading light and a USB port to charge his iPad. He prefers his old one and has been in a mood all evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 244

You deserved it 365

Showtime!

By Anonymous - 13/12/2025 09:00

Today, my daughter decided to make popcorn and for some reason she thought the bag of seeds was for one portion's worth, so she poured the whole damn bag into our popcorn maker and filled half the kitchen floor. It now smells like a cinema lobby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 297

You deserved it 116

Won't someone think of the landlords?

By Broke - 27/12/2025 12:00

Today, it's been months since I inherited a nice house, only to discover it overrun with squatters. I had to legally evict them, costing thousands. When they were ordered to vacate, they set the house on fire. Now I have a blackened ruin and depleted savings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 556

You deserved it 68

Lighting in a bottle

By Anonymous - 17/01/2026 20:00

Today, I have an amazing girlfriend. She’s smart, funny, educated, gets along with my friends and family, but she’s such a snooze in the sack, it makes me miss my psycho ex. That woman was a toxic mess of a person but she could do things that would make a porn star blush. What’s wrong with me? FML

I agree, your life sucks 118

You deserved it 352

Bad trip

By Anonymous - 11/02/2026 15:00

Today, after I flew 16 hours across the world to see my girlfriend, on the fifth day of the holiday we broke up because she ended up telling me she "can't do distance." After all those hours of flying, we spent the last 3 days in the hotel room mostly crying, and I asked her face to face, "Why did you break me?" She left; I'm broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 368

You deserved it 101

Corporate policy gone wild

By Fatasfk - 20/02/2026 12:00

Today, I found out I was overlooked for a promotion because apparently I don’t have the same body type as the other girls on that unit. This explains why I’m always cropped or completely left out when they post group photos on the company website. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 96

Priorities

By L - 01/03/2026 12:00

Today, my girlfriend ended things. We'd had issues because of my communication skills and her confidence, but we were working on it. The last straw? That I couldn't stay with her one night because I suddenly had to go home and take care of my sick mother. She then asked to talk and said I was neglecting her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 369

You deserved it 78

On the ropes

By Nicky - 24/03/2026 15:00

Today, I'm in bed pretending to sleep because I don't want to see my husband. He's manipulative and a jerk to me some times. I just don't want to deal with him anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 173

Touchdown

By Anonymous - 26/03/2026 09:00

Today, I excitedly announced that I made captain of the football team. My stepdad told me to shut up and not rub it in. He's a failed high school football player himself, and here I was thinking that we were so close, he would be so proud of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 487

You deserved it 54

Third or fourth opinion?

By River Maria - 28/03/2026 03:00

Today, after months of being told I have pneumonia by different doctors, I decided to go to another hospital with better staff. There I learned that I will actually need to have open heart surgery to replace two valves in my heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 60

Ungrateful brat

By Anonymous - 29/04/2026 06:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, despite all I've sacrificed to stay home with my child, and operating a small business while they are in school, my child decided to make a punchline out of me and roasted me in front of the whole family because my husband paid for my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 108

"The report of my death was an exaggeration"

By Luke Mackay - 03/05/2026 08:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I went to my local pub for a drink. There was a giant sign that read, “Welcome to Luke’s celebration of life.” My name is Luke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 109

Uprooted

By Anonymous - 18/05/2026 17:00 - United States

Today, my parents said that we're moving back to Los Angeles. I'm so fucking pissed off because in the couple of years since we moved to a tiny town, I've become a different person and love my new life. This is just completely undoing everything I've been through and they won't let me move in with my new best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 94

The end

By Anonymous - 07/06/2026 11:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, while trying to document another unfair incident, as well as suspected fraud in my toxic work environment, I accidentally replaced months of text in my document with a single period. Cloud backup saved over the actual note I needed. Months of diligence gone and I'll probably continue to be stepped on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 284

How does this keep happening?

By Paul - 14/06/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I meant to forward an email to my coworker with the message “Can you believe this crap?” referring to our client’s request. Instead, I hit “Reply All.” The client responded: “Yes, I can believe it. And I expect it done by Friday.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 76

You deserved it 704

Don't shoot the messenger

By Anonymous - 18/06/2025 08:00 - Australia

Today, I took my best friend to see her dad in hospital. While they were talking in another room about his care, he took his last lucid words before his death. I was the only one there and I'd never even met him before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 70

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The Top

Today, I was roused from my peaceful slumber by the sound of evil laughter coming from my closet. It was my old Furby, with dead batteries, that I could have sworn I got rid of several years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 083

You deserved it 2 430

Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 699

You deserved it 2 688

Today, I realized that when my new roommate said we could both use the condoms he bought, he didn't mean separately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 427

You deserved it 4 531

Today, after two weeks visiting my boyfriend's family in rural Mississippi, we finally returned to civilization. Unfortunately, I pick up on accents really easily, and now I sound like a hick. My boyfriend thinks it's cute, but I hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 658

Today, the best restaurant in our neighbourhood is owned by a husband and wife who scream at each other constantly. Everyone thinks it’s funny, so they have a lot of loyal customers. I took a date there but the screaming gave her flashbacks to her own parents, so she hyperventilated and fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 745

You deserved it 298

Today, my girlfriend told me she got a hefty bonus at work and will pay off my credit card debt. I was gonna break up with her because I’d been working on resolving things with my ex-girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69

You deserved it 1 006