FML - The Follow-Up

OP here! Seeing how the background check was clear, I guess the year and a half she spent locked up in an asylum was sealed. She's genuinely psychotic, and it's not some bad breakup kind of hate. As for the job, she was denied based on the results of her MMPI(a psych evaluation test), which were not disclosed. When I applied, I hated that thing, but now I'm kinda glad we have to take it.

OP here, her kids were the best. That's the worst part of losing the job.

Hi guys! I'm the OP :) I'm 19, and my boyfriend's 20. I thought LotR was better, personally. To be fair, I've only seen one of the Star Wars movies, and he's only seen half of one of the LotR movies, so we were both a little biased. This was last night though, and by the morning, it was forgotten. We're all good now. Thanks for your comments! :)

So yeah, storing money in the oven is a terrible idea. My bf (we'll call him Huck because he's a dumbass) is a bit paranoid and insisted on hiding the money somewhere where burglars couldn't find it. I told him it was fine since our nearest neighbors are a couple miles away but he insisted so I just gave up. Didn't realize that idiot would hide the cash in the oven then have a huge brain fart and use the oven to cook. We aren't complete idiots though, we do keep our life savings in the bank. The reason Huck put money in the oven was because we live on a farm that's a bit distant from the nearest major bank. We keep some money on hand in case something breaks and we have to fix it or make repairs and such. It's quicker when we have the money on hand. Otherwise we'd have to spend a couple hours driving to the bank, buying supplies, then coming back. Also while money does burn at 451 degrees, 451 degrees is the auto-ignition point of paper (the temperature that paper catches fire without being exposed to an external flame). So if the air temperature was 451 degrees the money would have burned but Huck put the money at the bottom of the oven, right on top of the hot metal burner thingy (I don't know what it's called) and that metal thing gets red hot. But yeah, Huck realized his stupidity after the oven finished preheating and managed to save some of the money though a third of it still burned to some degree. I'm still pretty pissed regardless and kinda feel like shoving Huck into the oven as well. The fact that he was trying to be nice by cooking dinner is the only thing preventing me from completely going apeshit on him. The first thing I'm making him do is go to the bank and try to replace the money. And he will never be in charge of safekeeping money ever again.

Hi, OP here. To give some context, I got a few t shirts for my birthday. My birthday was a month ago(thanks for the birthday wishes!) but only found out about the fact that my mom stole said razor a day ago, because I saw the package addressed to me in the trash. Needless to say, it is too late to steal back. I had posted another birthday FML(from the actual day of) never got posted. Got locked outside of my car in the rain for 3 hours, couldn't afford a locksmith, and missed my birthday dinner.

Wow, this is the first time one of my FMLs have been accepted! I googled whatever was happening on my arm, and I think 26 may or may not be right. According to the internet, if should go away in a few days, and it was a spider bite. But ever since I was a kid, I've always attracted some weird bug bites, but this has never happened to me before. Unfortunately, I am the type of person that will twist my wrist and still just say that I'm fine. Like that time where I threw up twice when I was 11 years old and still insisted that I was well enough to go to school, only to be sent back home when I threw up again. I applied some type of cream thing on the bite, and it has gotten better. It'll probably go away in a few days. Hopefully.

Bingo! He's a black lab. And apparently likes shiny things.

A little background info. I've been with my girlfriend for four years- She is not the type to make me work while she does shit all. We did have a long talk about this. She is just very stressed out as she is not here for 3 days out of the week because she makes a 2 hour commute to and from university every week and when she is here she works. She is just stressed and tired and feeling guilty about not spending enough time with our dog pepsi. She is not lazy, and certainly not a bitch just struggling keeping up with all aspects of her life right now. Thanks to all the nice and supportive comments we both appreciate them. :)

Hi, this is OP. To be fair, he did fly me out to visit him and put a real effort into making the week we had together great. That said, after I did manage to fix the flight back, I think he was scared I was going to kick him in the balls for that stunt for most of the extra 24 hours we had together. But the makeup sex was great and I barely managed to make it back in time for work obligations, so bf is EXTREMELY lucky :) And we have a new relationship rule of not ******* with travel arrangements. Sigh.

I wish I wore my sky blue Wii boxers for that momentous occasion, then. I am filled with regret.

Hi, this is OP! I can't believe this got posted! Anyway, he has always been a huge mama's boy and thinks that her way is the only way. She is a rather rude and opinionated woman, and has raised him to think that there is only one way to do things, and that's her way. I did talk to him and explain that I am not his mother and that I like myself just as I am and don't plan on changing, and he got pretty upset about it. We are now over, but it doesn't bother me much since this has been an ongoing issue for awhile now, and he just can't accept me for who I am. He was always trying to tell me that I should cut my long hair super short because his mom cut hers that way, and even asked me what I would do if I woke up with short hair, which concerned me. He also told me he and his mom didn't like my choice of clothing so that I should dress like she does, that I should wear my makeup like hers, and that my opinions, morals and values should be exactly the same as his mother's. It was just too much, and he got really upset when I told him no. He even suggested I quit college and my decent-paying job and get a job working with his mom for minimum wage and to draw welfare like her. He also always expected me to drive him everywhere, buy him everything he wanted, and baby him. I think I dodged a bullet, and I feel much better without all of the pressure to change.

OP here!! Wow, thanks for the funny comments, guys! If I knew this would have gotten featured so quickly I would have made an account beforehand! Anyways, quick follow-up: This "class" of mine is actually a co-op program in music for songwriting/recording/touring which I'm doing a second time now. My teacher knows me well, the student in question is my best friend and her father found the incident to be quite funny actually. All is good!

Hi OP Here For those wondering, it was the Fury at Carowinds. I've heard rumors of it stopping a lot, but is been really hoping to beat my fear. My state of mind was millions do this, just think to yourself you know it will end so enjoy the ride. Imagine my surprise when the ride stops. No more coasters any time soon. Thanks for the supportive comments.

OP here. For clarity's sake, this actually happened to me several years ago, on the first day of my summer break. I had to spend the rest of break, as well as my birthday in a cast.

OP here. Can't believe this actually got published. Insight time: we've been stuck in the little-to-no-money rut for a about a year now. The detergent we had smelled like hospitals and that weird plastic-y smell you get hit with at the dentist's office. We finally have enough money to get the stuff that has an actual scent instead of whatever "clean breeze" is supposed to be, so it's a small victory that is actually quite symbolic to us. Your comments had me laughing. A lot of you are right; enjoy the little things. You tend to miss out if you overlook them :)

The sad part was there wasn't even a box of cheerios in the room at the time (even though there usually is). I had to go to my food spot and double check anyway so I could sleep.

Hey there! OP here. I am completely alive and well although I have developed a hatred for hornets. On the plus side, I did get a pretty badass nickname! - Hornet Bait (RHChiliPeppers)

OP here, many thanks to those that saw the humor in this! For those that think "YDI", you should know that this happened a VERY long time ago and my kids have all grown up to be successful adults with rich fulfilling lives...

wow thanks for all the comments guys! yes, my luck in this case was awful. for those wondering, I did pay my insurance. the issue wasn't non payment. I just bought my car less than a month ago. Progressive, my company, never informed me of the photo inspection with new cars and since this is my first new car I had no idea. They chose their sole form of communication through postal service. Never received an email. so comp and collision were cancelled on my car insurance. Now the post office is 100% responsible for fixing my car. However, since its the government insurance they take their sweet time. I will be without my car for many months unless my insurance will cover and they can reimburse my insurance. You guessed it....that's not gonna happen. yes I will be suing. yes I will be without my brand new car, that now has $7000 worth of damage. fml.

YES? I was waiting for someone to say that! I'm guessing you and I are in the same boat. But who knows? Maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both be second classes in a few months.

Thanks for all the sympathies. This is my first FML to get published so I'm super happy. It's my first week back at school in four years. I received my bachelors and started working full time. I've had the luxury of parking in a parking lot all this time. I actually live in New York City so street parking is extremely difficult to find. I should have known better when I saw such a close spot to the school. #17 is completely correct. I was so convinced that it was Tuesday that I didn't even think to double check the date but I've learned my lesson now. I'm going to suck it up and pay it. I'm shaking my own head because it's such a silly reason to get a ticket.

Hey guys, I'm the OP. It was 67 mustang fastback and I was driving it home from the workshop late at night. And to all those wondering, no the car didn't survive because the asshole was driving a truck, it's sitting in a garage but I don't even know if I'm going to go look at it for a while now.

Hey, OP here! You know, this might be a comment thread that saves lives. I had already decided to put my foot down on me or my husband ever riding with MIL, but...I hadn't thought about everyone else. And now I have. I do not live with my in-laws, but we live in the same town and I cannot drive at night so it gets awkward to refuse their offers when my husband can't take me somewhere. Funny thing is, there is no legal restrictions on my driving,the DMV keeps insisting I'm fine, but I know that my contacts and retinal disease give me issues with headlights and therefore I shouldn't. I'm fine during the day, but stay off the road at night. I'm careful because my eye disease is from my father, who kept driving at night when he shouldn't. Nearly killed himself in an accident. I know who my MIL's doctor is, and I'm going to call his office. She MUST have lied to the DMV, and I think it'll be easier to talk to her doctor than to the DMV. I just have to brace myself for if she finds out. Thank you all for the help. My in-laws are rather good at manipulation. I've known them for ten years, and they use MIL's medical issues to overrule literally everything. She has serious psych issues, and FIL is very protective of her feelings. To the point of letting her lie to my husband's doctors when he was in the ER because it made MIL "feel useful" to tell the doctor's things about my husband's health. She was making up all kinds of things about my husband's condition when he went in for emergency surgery, and when I corrected her I got yelled at by my father in law for making MIL "feel bad." Nevermind that her lies to the operating surgeon could have gotten my husband seriously hurt or killed. So yeah, this ends now. I'm not going to let her hurt anybody else if I csn help it. Wish me luck, I've got a fight on my hands...

Update! I talked to my boss about it and he agreed that it seemed odd that I'd do something like that, but said that he had placed the punishment just in case. I'm off the hook though, so no training for me!

Hello everyone, OP here. So it seems I should clarify a few things over here, don't want you guys worrying over something not that important :D first of all, we were both surprised our FML was published since we are both avid FML readers and have often joked that we should share some situations with you. This time, again and then I decided to actually share it and - hey presto :D then came the backlash. I forgot I was on the internet- I'm not an avid social media user so I'm not used to it. For everyone speculating: yes, the Sherlocks among you have correctly deducted that I am indeed 21 and my boyfriend is 22. We have been going out for almost 3 years now and are very happy together. We even have talked about having children together in lighter moments but on the evening I posted it my darling man was not very relaxed and I was amused by the cliché behaviour of him freaking out and me being overly attached. He did pretend to die violently every time I wanted to talk about it to the point that we were both just in tears laughing. But no worry, we both are NOT having children anytime soon. I was talking about the future, 7-10, maybe even 15 years. I want to be a late mum because as you guys probably haven't guessed I am a trained nanny and child minder and therefore know full well how tiring and difficult children can be, even though I love them dearly. And so does my boyfriend by the way. He is the most wonderful uncle to two tiny kiddos we both love more than anything, which is why I thought he was ok with talking and dreaming about our child-filled future. Obviously not. Boys will be boys but that is fine as well of course. Lastly, I want to apologise to anyone who might or might not feel offended by me joking about seizures, in no way was I reflecting it and realising what that could mean. I am sorry. And as a side note- Tessie is my dog. Cheerio and thanks for reading and worrying about unwanted children set into this world (of which there are far too many) love from a loving Austrian/British Nanny and veterinary student :)

OP here. My cat is an indoor cat, we rescued her when she was 2 months old and she never left the house in the last 3 years. My dog popped a corner of the screen out of one of my windows and that's how my cat got outside. We went to all of our nearby neighbors asking them to keep an eye out for her, and the particular person who has my cat hates my husband. We thought it was strange he was being so nice and friendly towards us the first day, and now we know why.

Hello everyone, OP here :). Just like to verify a few things. The necklace was not a beaded thing, it had a glass charm about the size of the eraser on a pencil, and that was the part my cat got. Thankfully he didn't get the chain, that would be so painful! I will take him to the vet soon to make sure it went through him safely. It actually was in a jewelry box, but it was upright and had handles that his paws could slip through-which I was very much not aware of xD. There were no beads or sharp ends though, and since it is so small, I think the little guy will be okay. Clever little bastard though.

OP here, wow didn't expect it to make it on here ? Well so far no change, she even asked me are you sure it's not part of you, like how often does anybody know themselves there. What? I know myself very well there and it's not normal. Got an appointment with the gyno for next week so should be all good :) thought it was suspicious I got an appointment within half hour of ringing...

OP here, firstly, there's a lot more to the story than I could fit in 300 characters. The dog that are the blanket is actually my well behaved one. She hardly ever eats anything. She didn't eat the whole blanket. Just chunks of it. She was in her kennel at the time because it's been raining and she's chosen to play in the mud. I'm renting a house with white carpet and I've also had to wash my sheets multiple times in one day due to the mud. So as soon as she comes inside, she goes in her kennel (if she's muddy. If she's not both dogs chill with me). She actually did stop chewing the blanket and started chewing her chew toy. She is a puppy. 7-8 months old, but she's not the hellraiser, the other one is. She was able to poop half of it out on her own, but she was running around with blanket coming out of her ass, trying to figure out what the hell was going on. It was also 11 at night and the area I'm in doesn't have a 24 hour vets office. At this point, I think she's about to start going into her first heat cycle and this can cause dogs to have abnormal behavior. This was a first time thing and it won't be happening again. The reason there's a blanket in the kennels, is because I like my dogs to be comfortable.

Op here didn't login to post because I didn't think it would get published. I want to clarify a few things. #1 I'm not on welfare. #2 I work part time but my employer doesn't want me to get another job. #3 I work overnight shifts for below minimum wage. #4 I needed a college diploma to get this job.