Alcohol, Drunk and Gross: Top of the morning to ya

Top of the morning to ya

By Anonymous - 11/09/2012 13:32 - United States - Santa Ana

Today, I was sitting at a bus stop reading a book when out of the corner of my eye I spotted a middle-aged lady in a leopard-skin coat stumble up to me. She stopped, belched twice, and unleashed a torrent of red wine colored vomit onto my bag. It was 8:45 am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 717

You deserved it 1 639

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By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 09:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I was sitting on the bus when a large woman with what seemed like the flu came to sit beside me. After snorting hideously for five minutes, she picked up her scarf, blew her nose into it, and dropped it. It fell on my lap. When I stood up to leave the bus, there were streaks of snot on my new skirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 262

You deserved it 3 095

By fml_forever32 - 23/12/2009 18:56 - United States

Today, I was in the bus on my way home. I was reading a book, and drops of something were getting all over it. It was the man sitting next to me who was asleep and drooling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 144

You deserved it 2 506

Perfume Allergy Man strikes again!

By Lor - 09/10/2019 06:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a woman got on the bus wearing extremely strong perfume and sat in the seat in front of me. The gentleman I was sitting next to began violently sneezing, so much so that he eventually sneeze-vomited all over my lap and backpack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 861

You deserved it 175

Banished

By Anonymous - 25/11/2023 20:00

Today, I was on an early flight home after a night of drinking. I was sat in my seat when I started feeling sweaty and nauseous. I grabbed the puke bag and started gagging, then puking, and a really loud fart came out. Everyone heard it. The attendant switched me seat to sit alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 158

You deserved it 832

Sorry guys

By pukathlon - 10/12/2010 17:21 - United States

Today, I was taking the bus back to my university campus, having left work early feeling sick. While on the bus I started retching. I managed to hold it in for a while, but as I stood up to get off the bus, I started puking through my mouth and nose. This was in front of twenty other passengers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 239

You deserved it 3 003

Cool your jets, lady

By all puked out - 13/07/2014 21:14 - Netherlands

Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 807

You deserved it 4 343

By eewww - 06/05/2011 15:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I took a 40 minute bus ride home from work. The first 20 minutes were spent listening to the drunk man behind me moan uncontrollably and belch. The last 20 minutes were spent trying to ignore the vomit he left on my back as he got up to leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 797

You deserved it 3 713

By herzausstein - 21/12/2009 22:36 - Belgium

Today, I took the train home. When seated, I suddenly noticed something wet on my seat. Without looking, I thought it was water since it was snowing outside. Guess again. It was vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 669

You deserved it 7 100

Giga barf

By Anonymous - 03/07/2022 06:00

Today, some woman, sick with god knows what, didn’t vomit into the bin next to my car, or even just onto the floor, she lurched over to my car and vomited through my open window onto my shirt and legs, and down into the footwell. I can still smell it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 176

You deserved it 102

By girlw/ablog - 02/07/2019 11:00 - United States - Austin

Today, while on a bus, an elderly lady sat next to me sneezed so hard, snot literally went flying. I even offered her a napkin, that she refused. After a brief panic and realizing she had nothing to clean her mess with, she "inconspicuously" wiped her snotty hand on my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 931

You deserved it 143

Argumental_Rhino 8

Tuesday 11 September 2012 18:51

What the **** is wrong with people these days, sorry for that OP.

RagingWill 17

Tuesday 11 September 2012 18:59

Oh God. She found out about "YOLO"..

Comments

claysgurl09 5

Wednesday 12 September 2012 0:43

What is wrong with the world today!! I mean really! Who reads a book anymore ;)

THE_A_TEEN 27

Wednesday 12 September 2012 7:14

I can't tell if you're joking or a moron who thinks books are for squares.

gabfoundnemo 5

Wednesday 12 September 2012 2:16

You can tell you're American, that's a common occurrence in the UK.

booboo1997 3

Wednesday 12 September 2012 2:17

Snooki? Is that you?

PunkySpunky78 15

Wednesday 12 September 2012 2:47

I wonde how this lady was since I been called middle aged and I'm only 34 years old

Kidkaplan 19

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:11

11 years ago at that time the plane hit the N. Tower of the wtc

Tacolife54 0

Wednesday 12 September 2012 6:55

ewwwwww that is all that needs to be said

merrielp 13

Wednesday 12 September 2012 11:11

Ummmm 5 o'clock somewhere?

Austyn57 1

Wednesday 12 September 2012 17:00

wth man!!!

takhay 7

Wednesday 12 September 2012 21:53

Living in Japan and dealing with all the drunk business men in the wee hours of the morning makes me truly empathize with you, OP. hope your day got better!